It was a clever line, and she knew that her husband was attempting to break the tension in the air. She would not let that play, however. There was too much on her mind, and she needed to get out her words before she lost her nerve.
“I understand that ye have come to speak with me, and in truth, I’ve something I wish to tell ye as well.” Willow sucked in a breath to steady herself. “I apologize for everythin' me brother has done to yer family. Truly. And I thank ye for allowing Lilith to return his body for burial.”
Keegan stood up, approaching her with his hand casually clutching the pommel of his sword. Willow stepped back and to the side, retreating until her legs were up against the bed. Her husband furrowed his brow, and she noticed how he rolled his lips between his teeth and looked to the floor sheepishly.
“It isnae yer fault that Magnus attacked or did anythin' to me family for that matter. I daenae blame ye. I?—”
“That is all well and good, Keegan. And I appreciate ye sayin' as much. Still, I ken me place amidst all this tension. I do.”
Willow could hear her heart in her ears like a furious drumbeat. She trembled, and it was abundantly clear that if she didn’t say her piece soon, Willow would lack the resolve to do so at all. She couldn’t let that happen.
“Willow, I wanted to?—”
“Nay,” she cut in, terrified to let Keegan continue, “it is truth. I grasp that plainly enough. And I have come to a decision.”
Keegan’s brow furrowed all the more, and he took a step toward her, shaking his head slightly as he looked at her confused.
“A decision?”
“Aye.” Willow nodded, straightening her spine in an attempt to hide her uncertainty. “I will remain within Castle Brahanne as yer wife.”
She watched Keegan relax some, the inklings of a smile creeping up at the corner of his mouth, no doubt glad that his legacy might be preserved. Willow could not stop there. He needed to understand, and while his “convenience” would still be upheld, she would not have any miscommunication between them. He would hear her truths, and Keegan could do with them what he liked.
“Until that is, I am able to provide ye with an heir.” Keegan’s expression dropped once more, and Willow forced herself to continue. “I have promised ye me hand, and I will nae go backon that. I will give ye an heir so that the Brahanne name may live on, but then I willnae darken yer home further. Once it is done, I will return to Castle McCallum or whatever home Lilith and the others are set to. Ye willnae have to see me again.”
The sound of Keegan’s teeth clacking together as he shut his mouth was obscenely loud. It remained silent for far too long as well, and as she watched her husband for clues to his understanding, Willow was struck by the pained look painted across his face.
“Leave?” He lowered his chin, staring at her from beneath his brows. “Ye wish to leave me after an heir?”
Willow nodded, unable to form words.
“I…” Keegan’s head dropped entirely, and his eyes were pinned to the floorboards at his feet. “If that is what ye want…”
It was a moment before Keegan continued, and when he did, her husband met her eyes once more, his shimmering with something she knew to be impossible. Keegan didn’t tear up, and he certainly wouldn’t over her—the kin of the man who’d nearly taken everything from him.
“I willnae stop ye.”
Willow was confident that were she to glance down at her chest, she would see the hilt of a blade protruding from between her ribs. As it was, she couldn’t move, could scarcely breathe, andWillow struggled to keep the tears in her own eyes from spilling over.
Daenae do this, Willow. This is what ye wanted. This is how it has to be.
The floor creaked, and Willow’s attention was forced up as Keegan took a step toward her, reaching out for her hands. She began to pull back, but the laird snatched them up and brought her clutched hands to his chest.
“I willnae keep ye from what ye want, Willow. I could never do that. Still,” Keegan looked up from her hands into her eyes, doing nothing to stop the tear that slid down his cheek, “I wish ye wouldnae leave.”
Willow was dumbstruck, her pulse a roaring scream in her head as she witnessed the Laird of Brahanne Castle—this formidable warrior who’d taken on her brother like no one had and lived to tell the tale—allow himself to cry.
Keegan chuckled lightly as he reached out and lifted her jaw up, closing her mouth for her. He shook his head, sniffling slightly.
“I daenae think I’ve ever seen ye speechless, lass.”
Abruptly shaking herself, Willow couldn’t stop herself from leaning forward, still enraptured by the raw emotion Keegan wasn’t hiding or shoving aside.
“Ye wish for me to stay?” He nodded, a smile barely lifting his cheek. “I daenae understand. Why would ye want me to stay? Ye’ve made it quite clear that ye daenae believe ye can be a proper laird with me around.”
Keegan looked as if he’d been kicked in the gut, and he grunted low through a slight laugh. “Ye arenae wrong, lass. I said as much, and I tell ye plainly now. I regret those words.”
“Keegan, ye?—”