The only thing that she could think would be a distraction to him now was…
“What do ye mean? What…distracted ye?”
Willow knew the answer. Of course, she did. But she needed to hear it from Keegan’s mouth. Though, Willow didn’t understand why. It was a cruelty to herself, but it was one that her body and mind somehow yearned for as if the pain would be her penance.
“Can ye really nay see it?” Keegan’s brow dipped low over his eyes, and his voice was thick and rough. “Ye, Willow. Ye are the distraction that nearly caused this entire castle to fall.”
She couldn’t breathe, her chest kicked in by his words sure as a blow from an angry mule. Willow stuttered and faltered, failingto rein in the tears now. Her stare flicked back and forth between Keegan and the floor, nausea swirling through her.
“I ken it wasnae yer fault. I do. But because I have allowed meself to be so distracted, Damon got hurt. I could still verra well lose me brother because I put me own compulsions ahead of duty.”
“Brother!” Melissa called out, and Willow recoiled, her eyes shutting as she remembered that his sister was sitting just past him.
Mortification and grief powered through Willow like a raging storm. She couldn’t be in this room a moment longer. Because Keegan was wrong. It had been her fault that Damon got her. None of this would have happened if she had not “distracted” him, if she had not been so unsatisfactory to her brother.
Hell, it would be better if I wasnae born at all. Perhaps then Magnus wouldnae have been such a blighter. Twins truly are a curse.
I am the curse.
“It’s all right, Lady Melissa. It would likely be best if I were to take me leave. It…it has been an arduous day, to say the least.”
She couldn’t stop herself from looking over at Keegan as he faced Damon once more. “Aye. It…I will remain here for the evenin'. I…I am in nay place to be around ye at present.”
Willow’s jaw trembled as she fought back the urge to sob loudly. Instead, she simply nodded, regarding Damon as he lay still asleep on the healing chamber’s table, which had been set up like a bed of sorts.
“I pray that ye recover quickly, Damon. I apologize for me role in all this.” She stared at the juncture between two slabs of stone beneath her feet. “I am sorry, truly. Thank ye for yer kindness in allowing Lilith and me to bury our brother.”
She bowed, curling into a low curtsey even as Keegan did not look back at her.
“Good evenin', me laird.”
Hauling herself up, Willow straightened her spine as much as she could and then proceeded toward the door. Her steps were too loud on the floor, and when she reached for the handle, her fingers trembled.
But she would not fall apart, not here.
So, she pulled the panel open and slipped out into the hall. As the light from the healer’s room died behind her, Willow let the tears fall. Whatever had been her plans for her life, it was clear that none of them would come to pass. And now, she would be forced to find a way to survive the cruelty of another laird, even if Keegan had more of a right to his anger than her brother did.
31
The door closed softly, nearly so much so that Keegan didn’t hear it. But he was listening intently to every sound in that room, and he wouldn’t have missed Willow’s exit.
Or the sound of his heart hammering in his ears as if screaming at him.
“What in God’s name, Keegan?!” Melissa stood up from the chair she had dragged to Damon’s side for the first time since coming to see him. “Have ye lost yer damned mind?”
Keegan sucked in a breath through his nose, casting his stare to the ceiling. He didn’t have time for this, or even if he did, he was in no mood to have an argument with his sister, who couldn’t understand the intricacies of the situation.
“That’s enough, Melissa. I dinnae request yer opinion on me personal life.”
She stomped over, pulling Keegan around to face her. “Ask for it or nae, I’ll still be givin' it to ye, seein' as ye cannae retrieve yer head from yer arse.”
He glared, snapping his attention to his sister as the fury swelled in his gut. “Ye will address yer laird with respect, Lady Melissa.”
“Och,” she crossed her arms over her chest, sneering right back at him, “me laird, is it? Ye’re me brother, and I’ll be tellin' ye when ye’re acting a fool.”
Facing away from her, leaving Damon to his back in what felt like a betrayal, Keegan sighed, pinching his brow.
“Can ye nae leave me be? This is me life to be dealin' with, and I shall tend to it as I see fit.”