I’m not to blame?
Hayden nearly fell over.
Evie was right.
If he wasn’t the cause of his grandfather’s heart attack, that meant…
Hayden couldn’t wrap his head around what that meant.
“I was chastising Clyde. Something was bothering him. Had been for months. He wasn’t like himself. He…” Gran stared at Hayden as if searching for answers. “My mother would have said he was an old codger. And maybe he was…is.” She took hold of her straw cowboy hat brim and pulled it over her ears, cracking that straw. “Why does everything I say feel so odd? I’m tired of being fuzzy in the head.”
“You’ll feel better soon,” Hayden tried to reassure.
Gran released her hat, blinked like she was mentally shifting gears, and then squeezed his arm. “I’ve been meaning to ask you something.”
“Go on.” The sun shed more light on the ranch. Hayden noticed Evie sitting on a porch rocking chair, computer in her lap.
“Why haven’t you married?” Gran released Hayden, turning to stare at the barn. “I keep thinking… I don’t want you to go through life alone. A man without a soulmate misses out on so much.” She reached for his hand, grasping it tightly.
Hayden wasn’t going to tell Gran he was married. She’d only forget again. He stared out at the ranch, the words pressing up his throat whether he wanted them to or not. “I can’t do love. I don’t trust it. People leave. They turn on you. And the ones who don’t…get hurt because of choices I make. It’s safer for all concerned if I don’t put my faith in love.”
A gasp rent the air.
Hayden turned toward the house, gaze landing on Evie in that rocking chair. Her gaze seemed fixed on her laptop, her expression carefully blank.
Hayden felt the urge to apologize. But facts were facts. Attraction and friendship were all he’d allow himself where his wife was concerned. Best Evie knew that sooner rather than later.
*
Eve went about her duties at Oak Hill that morning with a heavy heart.
Hayden is scared to love.
“That’s too serious a face for a newlywed.” Buddy Johnson was a permanent resident with mobility issues. His fluff of short white hair was as soft as the former newspaper editor’s temperament. “Don’t tell me you have regrets already?”
Too many to count.
Eve donned a smile, handing the old man his morning pills in a paper cup and another cup full of water. “I love my husband.” But now she knew Hayden would never let himself love her. She’d been a fool to think she could treat this marriage like the fulfillment of a daydream, that she could somehow win Hayden’s heart.
“But…” Buddy prompted, having taken his pills all in one go. “I feel as if I’m only getting half the story.”
“Nothing to see here,” Eve singsonged. “Just a happy-ever-after.” A temporary happy-ever-after.
“None of which was ever achieved without a goodly amount of effort.” Buddy used a remote to operate his fancy lift chair, putting it in recline mode. “Do you see my blanket anywhere?”
It was on the bed. Eve retrieved it and draped it over Buddy. “Can I get you anything else?”
“Just your promise that you’ll weather any marital storm that comes your way.” Buddy chuckled. “In addition to once being a beat reporter, I have experience answering the love advice column.”
“I’ll be sure to track you down if I ever need couple counseling.” For now, Eve needed advice about how to fall out of love with someone.
After Eve’s shift was over, she went to the Sagebrush Café to meet Ted Hale, a student in one of her online classes who lived in nearby Marietta. He’d been a ranch hand until he turned thirty. Now, he was following a career track much like Eve was. He worked the night shift at Oak Hill.
Eve had chosen the Sagebrush Café because it offered bottomless cups of coffee and the best cinnamon buns in the county. She entered the diner and glanced around, not seeing Ted. She did see Mom and Vi sitting in a corner booth.
They waved her over.
“What are you two doing here?” Eve slung her book-laden tote to the bench seat before perching on the end.