“Dismissed,” he said, turning back to the helm. “Get to work.”
For a beat, Finn and I just sat there, like the lecture had stripped us of the ability to move, like our limbs no longer took commands from our brains.
Finn broke the spell first. He stood, slow and heavy, then waited for me to do the same.
We stepped out of the bridge, and the second we made it to the end of the hallway and paused at the stairs leading down to the crew quarters, my lungs turned to concrete.
It was a foreign sensation — and yet familiar all at once.
I’d been here before, this edge-of-a-cliff feeling. The moment when your body starts reacting before your brain can even label what’s happening. My pulse was a war drum, thudding in my ears, in my throat, in my wrists. My chest tightened like a vise,ribs constricting, lungs shrinking, the air around me too thick to breathe.
I couldn’t get a full breath. No matter how hard I tried, it wasn’t enough.
It felt like drowning.
My fingers tingled, then went numb. My knees threatened to buckle. My skin went cold, clammy, a sheen of sweat blooming across my back even though I was shivering. Every sound was muffled except the rush of my own blood roaring in my ears.
Too much. Too fast.
Can’t fix this. Can’t breathe.
My thoughts splintered. Logic left the room. All that was left was panic, clawing up my throat like a scream with no exit.
My feet carried me down the stairs like they belonged to someone else, like they were just trying to outrun whatever explosion was building inside me. Every breath came too fast, too shallow, scraping down my throat like I was breathing in broken glass.
The words kept echoing.
I don’t want to fire anyone. But that doesn’t mean I won’t.
Not sure a glowing recommendation can overshadow drama.
You’ve lost the trust of the crew.
I’d worked so hard.
I’d given everything to this job. Every late night, every impossible party theme, every tear I’d cried in a guest cabin while scrubbing a toilet — none of it mattered. I’d erased it all with a stupid, careless surrender to desire.
I felt so… human.
All of it — all the years of effort and sacrifice — were hanging by a thread now and fraying fast.
Because I couldn’t stay away from him, even when I knew this was a possibility.
I nearly laughed at our stupidity.I’ll set an alarm. We can sneak back to our cabins.
And then what?
What did we actually think would happen?
We didn’t think. That was the problem.
“Ember,” Finn said softly behind me.
I kept descending the stairs, not stopping when my feet hit the bottom. Eli was in the mess making himself a quick breakfast. His eyes shot to us before he tore them away, only muttering an, “Excuse me,”as he shuffled past us and up the stairs.
He could barely look at us.
“Em…” Finn said again.