Their banter is familiar now, and there’s something about the way they go back and forth with each other that makes the knot in my chest unwind.
I expected to learn more about them—whether I wanted to or not—by living with them, but I didn’t expect to learn this.
They’re not just attractive Alphas. They’re not just powerful men who have important positions in this town they call home. They’re good men, who have chosen each other as family and demonstrate that in everything they do. I can’t help but envy that bond.
My hand goes to my neck unconsciously, and I run it over the badly healed bites there. They’re a constant reminder that I tried to have something like this. I wanted a family, a bond that would see me through whatever bullshit life threw at me, and it fell apart. Worse, it was just flat out rejected.
Part of me still wants that even now. Even though I feel like I have to be honest with myself and accept that it will never happen for me. The little family I’m making with Cora will justhave to be enough. The two of us, alone and unwanted by anyone else.
At least I can make sure Cora never feels the pain of being alone.
Later in the day, Cora and I head out so I can drop her off to spend time with Lainey and I can go to the bar for my shift. Cora’s in good spirits after her morning being taught to cook with the men, and she shows off her new signs to Lainey, who beams at her.
On my way to the bar, my phone rings, and I pull it out to see it’s Paul calling from the mechanic shop. Before I can let my mind run away with what he could be calling about, I answer.
“Hello?”
“Hey, Harper?”
“Yeah.”
“It’s Paul. Just wanted to give you a heads up about your car.”
I take a deep breath. “What’s the news?”
“Good, for once. The parts finally came in, so now we just have to put them in your car and you’ll be good to go.”
“Oh.” I blink, surprised that things are moving along this fast. “That’s great. How long do you think that’ll take?”
“Depends on a couple things,” he says. “But if all goes well, you should be back on the road in two days.”
Two days. When I first got here, two more days of waiting would have felt like an eternity. Now, it sounds like no time at all. And I should be happy about that. I should be relieved and excited even that I can finally get back on the road and get back to what was passing for my life before all of this happened. I hada plan, and my car giving up the ghost threw a wrench in it, but the plan was always supposed to pick back up and keep going.
But… something constricts in my chest, and it feels a whole lot like loss.
I can’t think like that though. This was always going to happen. That was the point.
So I shake myself and force a smile, even though Paul can’t see me right now.
“That’s great news,” I tell him. “Thanks for letting me know.”
Chapter 15
Harper
It’s really hard to focus for the next two days. The knowledge that I can leave any time now is distracting, always there in the back of my mind no matter what else I’m doing. The information sits heavy in my chest as I work, making my mind wander when I should be focused. There’s so much to consider now. What comes next? Where do I go and what will I do? The image of my future used to be at the forefront of my thoughts, but now… Now the problem is I can’t picture it anymore. I can’t see myself and Cora in some other town, some other crappy motel, starting over again.
It won’t be like Silver Falls, I know that much.
Wherever we end up won’t have friendly townspeople and handsome, kind Alphas. There won’t be an old cow for Cora to fawn over. It’ll just be the two of us, trying to figure things out on our own.
I scold myself for thinking that way because it was always going to be like that, and wishing otherwise is stupid. Wishing otherwise is what got us in the position we’re in now, and I can’t make the same mistakes again.
But I can’t stop thinking about it, and even though I’m good enough at my job that I can do parts of it on autopilot now, there are some parts that require my attention.
Which is why being spaced out during the lunch rush ends up biting me in the ass.
I go to take a stack of napkins to a table, coming around the bar and the one step between the bar and the rest of the room catches me off guard. My foot comes down wrong and my ankle rolls, sending me sprawling as pain shoots up my leg.