And no matter how hard she’d tried, Natalie had no idea how to process that.
“Go back to that night,” Tessa instructed in her professional psychologist’s voice. “Put yourself back in that moment, right before you thought Logan was going to kiss you.”
Normally Natalie would balk at her sister’s attempt shrink her, but at this point, she was willing to do just about anything if it meant finding some direction.
“Are you in that moment?”
“I’m there.” She could see it so clearly, even as her focus remained locked on the road ahead.
“How are you feeling? Say the first thing that pops into your head.”
“Confused.”
“Okay, good. What else?”
“I don’t know…” Natalie went with the next word that came to her. “Nervous, I guess.”
“And?”
“And, what?”
“What else are you feeling?”
“Nothing.”Everything.“A lot of things. I don’t know how to describe it.”
“Yes, you do. You’re just not trying.”
“Yes, I am!”
“Then tell me what else you feel.”
“I don’t know!” Natalie’s voice rose higher than intended.
Not surprising, Tessa shot right back with an even louder, “Bullshit! First word, Nat. What the fuck else were you feeling when you thought Logan was going to kiss you?”
“Excited, okay?” Natalie blurted without conscious thought. “I felt…”Oh, god.“I felt excited.”
Tears began to well, that last part of the confession barely a whisper.
With a much softer, gentler tone this time, her sister asked her next question. “And what did you feel when his truck’s horn interrupted the moment before you could fully kiss him?”
Natalie kept one hand on the wheel as she used the other to wipe away the tears falling down her cheeks. Her chin quivered, her bottom lip trembled, but she did her best to respond.
“When I heard that h-horn, I f-felt…” Her voice cracked as grief and guilt threatened to take over. Clearing the thick knot from her throat, admitted softly, “God, Tess. I wassodisappointed.”
A very long, very tense silence lingered. For a moment, she thought the call had lost its connection. But then Natalie heard a boisterous…
“Hallefreakinglujah!”
“Seriously?” She scowled. “This isn’t a reason for celebration, Tessa. I felt crushed that we didn’t get a chance to fully kiss, and then I felt like shitbecauseI felt so crushed.” She gave her sister a moment to really let that sink in , since she clearly hadn’t processed the gravity of the situation the first time. “I mean, it’s Logan, Tess. Logan Hayes.Hayes.”
“I heard you.” Her sister’s voice was calm as an afternoon breeze. “I’m just not sure what your point is.”
Lord save me from this smartassed woman.
“Tess…” Natalie made the warning clear.
“I’m sorry, you’re right.”