“Yes.”
Kane was right when he said that love and hate are two sides of the same coin. Because even though minutes ago I wanted to kill him, now I can’t imagine what he’s describing—not having him with me.
I’ve already lived through that, and it nearly killed me.
His blue eyes burn with emotion. “You have to know ... there isn’t a goddamned thing I wouldn’t do to keep you safe. You can hate me if you need to, but that will never change the fact that I love you.”
I let his words soothe the torn pieces of my soul, and breathe in his scent. As much as I want to curl up against him and be thankful he’s back, I need him to promise me something before I can begin to trust him again.
Kane and I lock eyes. “I can’t live with the secrets anymore. I won’t. If you can’t promise me you’ll never lie to me again, I will walk away from you right now and never look back.”
18
Kane
Ihad a choice, and I made it. I’ll live with the consequences because they were worth it to ensure her safety. There’snothingI wouldn’t do to keep Temperance safe, and I’ll never apologize for that. For hurting her, absolutely. I’ll never forget the tortured look in her eyes. It’ll haunt me for the rest of my life.
I don’t deserve her forgiveness, but I want it.
I don’t deserveherat all. But that doesn’t stop me from wanting her more than I want my next breath.
Now, I’m so fucking close to having everything I never knew I always wanted and needed in my life, and all I have to do is promise to never lie to her again. I’d rather cut off my own arm than ever see again the kind of pain on her face as when she walked into this warehouse.
I vow to myself right then that I will find a way to protect her without ever putting her through that kind of pain again. I fucked up. I made the wrong decision. I shouldn’t have kept it from her. At the time, it seemed like the safest choice, but after a month without her, I know it was the wrong one.
For the last four weeks, I’ve lived in a hell of my own making. One where I knew she existed, but I couldn’t see her or touch her. One where I couldn’t dare break my silence because there were too many threats against her.
I begged Mount—something I would have sworn I would never do—to protect her like he would protect his own wife. I offered himanything.
It was only after I had his guarantee of her safety that I left town to start hunting down my targets, one by one. Every time I pulled the trigger, I knew I was one step closer to this moment. The moment when I could come back to her.
I told myself even if she hated me and sent me away, I would let her live her life and fade into the background.
But I would never forget this woman who changed everything.
From Mexico to Canada, I eliminated man after man, until the only one who was left was the head of the trafficking operation. The one they called Lagarto.Lizard.
Ransom called dibs on the man who put the price on his head, and I agreed. The motherfucker was wily as shit, leading us both down dead ends to try to find him. Ransom and I agreed I would come back to New Orleans and track him down from here so I could be closer to Temperance if he tried to make a move on her now that his crew was all mysteriously missing. Not a single one of those bodies will ever be found.
He had to know we were coming for him, and we won’t stop until we put a bullet in his head.
That was yesterday.
I’ve been here less than twenty-four hours, and I already had to stop myself from approaching Temperance a handful of times. All I could do is watch as she squared her shoulders and went on with a life that didn’t include me.
It was a new kind of a hell. One I’d never before experienced. And now she wants me to promise I’ll never lie to her, or she walks away.
My answer requires no thought.
“I promise. No more secrets. If I’m trying to protect you, I’ll do it another way.”
I can feel the tension dissipate as her body relaxes against me.
“Thank God,” she whispers.
Before I can reply, Temperance wraps one hand around the back of my head and yanks my lips down to hers.
My only thought mirrors her words.