It was going to be a hard habit to break, for Ari andmeboth.
Separately, we were two broken people struggling to make sense of things, but together, maybe we could heal each other.I wasn’t going to consider any other alternative, so I hoped like hell I wasright.
My phone vibrated and I stepped outside the room, still watching her from the cracked door as Ianswered.
“Please tell me she’s really going to be okay.”My mom’s voice carried a heavy dose of fear, even though I’d kept her updatedbytext.
“She’s going to be fine, Mom.Ipromise.”
“Thank the Lord.”She paused.“And I swear, Rhett Hennessy, you’ve damn near given me a heart attack for the very last time.No more of thoseI’m in the hospitalmessages.I’mdone.”
“Iknow.”
“You going to talk her into staying?Plant some roots back where shebelongs?”
I had to smile.My mom could jump from subject to subject without any hesitation.“We’ve talkedaboutit.”
“Well, stop talking and just do it.Life is too short to waste time.I learned that thehardway.”
The sorrow in her voiceguttedme.
“I wish I would’ve found out something different, Mom.I wish we would’ve found out he had nothing to dowithit.”
She got quiet for a moment.“Me too, but it doesn’t change the fact that he was the love of my life.Good people do bad things, Rhett.Sometimes for good reasons, sometimes for bad ones, but that doesn’t mean all those memories we have are somehow worth less.And it surely doesn’t mean that what he did has any bearing on you.Youdidn’tdothis.”
“Ari said something along thoselines.”
“And she’s right.Focus on the future, Rhett.Ari will need all the support you can give.You both deserve to be happy.Iloveyou.”
“Love youtoo,Mom.”
I ended the call and watched Arisleep.
She was alive.I was alive.And that was all that mattered right now.Everything elsecouldwait.
66
Ariel
Mist blanketedthe cemetery as the priest said the final prayer to lay Heath to rest.My heart broke as my father wiped his eyes with a handkerchief.He’d finally been seen by a specialist who determined that he wasn’t suffering from dementia due to early-onset Alzheimer’s, but due to a toxic cocktail of the drugs he’d been taking.It had been another blow to realize that only Heath had the ability to switch out the pills in one of his arthritis prescriptions tocauseit.
As my brother’s ashes were now being interred, we couldn’t ask him why, but had to assume that it was because my father must have asked too many questions and Heath had needed themtostop.
As much as I wanted to assign a noble motive to what Heath had done, this was the final nail in that coffin.He couldn’t be exonerated, and I would have to live with that knowledge.But Rhett and I made a deal—we wouldn’t assume responsibility for actions that weren’t our own, and even though it was difficult to adhere to, I wastrying.
Rhett’s arm tightened around my shoulders as the priest said the final amen for theservice.
I’d held Esme as we both cried what seemed like a million tears for Erik.Nothing would ever be the same without him, and Esme had been apologetic when she handed me her resignation.She couldn’t be in the office without him.It hurt too much, and I didn’t blame her.I’d offered her the capital she needed to start her own company, no strings attached, and she was still considering my offer.We’d said good-bye to Jan the next day in a small serviceaswell.
Too many funerals in too short a time.Too much loss, heartache, andregret.
It was time to start fresh.Buthow?
Rhett pushed my father’s wheelchair beside me, and assisted him into the van that would take him back to the rehab center.He was scheduled to move home in a couple of weeks, but he’d surprised me by saying he’d rather check out a senior-living community because his house was too empty and quiet after the hustle and bustle of his currentplace.
If my brother weren’t already laid to rest, I would kill him for what he didtoDad.
Stop.Right there.We’re lettingthingsgo.