“There she is.” He grinned.
Stepping off the boat, I walked over to where he sat in his wheelchair and kissed his cheek.
“You didn’t have to wait out here for me,” I said.
“Why not? It’s a beautiful day. Maybe I missed you.” He winked.
“I know you did,” I smirked.
We went up to the house. Victor brought my bags inside and took them up to my room. Gabriel poured us a glass of scotch, and I took a seat on the couch.
“What’s wrong, Paige?”
“Nothing.” My brows furrowed. “Nothing is wrong.”
“Ah. Now I really don’t believe you. Is it Parker Hamilton?”
“No.” I stood from the couch, walked over to the window, and stared out at the ocean.
“You fell for him, didn’t you?” Gabriel asked.
“You’re crazy.” I tipped the glass to my lips. “I don’t fall for anyone. You of all people know that.”
“What did he say when you told him you were leaving?”
“I didn’t tell him. I left while he was sleeping. I don’t want to talk about him, Gabriel.”
“Why? Because you’re too scared to admit that you feel something for him?”
“You know that’s not true.” I whipped my body around and stared at him. “Hearthstone took my feelings away, Gabriel. They stripped that out of me. That was the point. Attachment makes you weak. Predictable. Dangerous.”
“They didn’t take anything, Paige. They tried to bury it. That’s different. I can see it in your eyes. You’re—you’re sad,” he spoke cautiously.
“You think this is easy for me? You think letting someone in doesn’t feel like stepping off a cliff with no ground beneath me? Like falling into the abyss?”
“I know it’s not easy for you. I think Parker Hamilton terrifies you because he sees what Hearthstone didn’t erase.”
“And what’s that?” I cocked my head.
“Your soul.” He gently smiled.
“I have no soul.” I turned and stared out the window.
Gabriel wheeled his wheelchair next to me.
“You never stopped being her. You just built armor around her,” he said.
“I don’t know how to be that person anymore. The one who feels things. The one who wants things. It’s been so long,Gabriel. They trained me to survive without needing anyone. That doesn’t just go away.”
“No. But surviving isn’t the same as living, Paige. I noticed the way your voice changes when you mention Parker’s name. There’s a softness in it I’d never heard before.”
“What if I don’t know how to love?” I quietly asked. “I’m not sure I even know what true love is or feels like.”
“Hearthstone didn’t take your heart. If they had, Parker wouldn’t matter to you. You wouldn’t be fighting this hard, and you wouldn’t be so scared. The fear you’re feeling is proof that it’s still there. And it’s okay to feel something for him. You deserve love, Paige. Don’t let what Hearthstone did define who you are. You’re more than that, and you deserve the world.”
“It doesn’t mean that I’m stopping at getting every last one of those assholes,” I said.
“Absolutely not. It’s called balance, Paige. You can still love Parker and go after Hearthstone.” He reached over and took hold of my hand. “It’s time you start living a normal life.”