“I promise to protect her heart and be the kind of man she deserves,” I tell them.
“She deserves the best,” River says easily, like it’s common sense. Out of all of her fathers, River probably coddled her the most. I’m sure he isn’t taking her moving well at all.
Grayson tugs River roughly in his arms, squeezing him tight. Their love for one another is easy, and I wonder if I’ll ever have something platonically close for me and my pack. I think Wells and I could get there, nothing romantic, but I already enjoy his company.
Forrest and I…we will just need to see how that goes.
What I do know is that the idea of waiting too long to bond Claire has me feeling unsettled, but I can’t rush her, I can’t rush this.
Jonah smacks my shoulder, harder than necessary, and I groan.
“Glad you got your head out of your ass,” he says and I shove him off me and he laughs. “We’re headed back to my place. We don’t head back to Philly until tomorrow night, so we can help Claire pack.”
“Thanks,” I reply and he clears his throat.
“They seem like good men. My sister seems to have found exactly what she was looking for.”
“She did. Do you know where Axel is?” I ask, and he just shrugs.
“See you tomorrow.”
“Night, man,” I say, and I go to the most likely place where Axel might be hiding out.
My theory is proven correct as I reach the rooftop. Axel is slumped on an outdoor couch with a blunt to his lips. I smack his legs to make room for me, and he grunts, but makes space.
He holds the joint out for me, and I take it, inhaling and passing back.
“Come to slum it with the Sørensen fuck-up?” he asks, inhaling and puffing out rings of smoke.
“If you’re going to be a mopey little bitch, I’ll leave,” I tell him, even though I don’t mean it. This is just how Axel and I operate. I know something big is bothering him and he just won’t tell anyone.
He laughs sardonically. “You’re fucking lucky, you know that?”
“To have your sister, I know that,” I reply and Axel shakes his head.
“Not just that. You figured your shit out, you have a pack, an Omega, a good job, you’re about to start your whole life. Claire has always known who she was, what she wanted, and she found it and I’m happy for her, same with Jonah, but…it feels like I’m getting left behind.”
I lean back in my seat, staring at my best friend. He’s always had this chaotic energy about him, like he hates the idea of being tamed or put in any box, but I’m wondering if it’s all a facade. Maybe Axel has dreams of domesticity. He just doesn’t know how to put it in words.
Axel and I have never been friends to beat around the bush, and I’m not about to start now.
“You’re your own worst enemy, you know. You’re not an Alpha, so fucking what? Neither is your dad and look at him,” I tell him, and he glares at me. “You want a pack? You want a real job? Go get one.”
“Who said anything about a real job?” he says with a laugh, resting the back of his skull on the seat, looking up at the dark sky.
“I am an Alpha,” he whispers.
“What?”
His Adam’s apple bombs with a heavy swallow. “I’ve been seeing a specialist, trying to figure out why I haven’t presented. It seems like I have a gene mutation. Not an Alpha and not really a Beta, either. It came up when there were complaints about me fighting in the Beta heavyweight bracket. Now I can’t fight in either and I’m in this annoying limbo of who I am and what I want to be.”
I take a long moment to really digest his words.
“Do they have any solutions for you?” I ask, and he takes a really deep toke before blowing the air out.
“They’re coming up with ideas, but until then nothing feels right. I can’t fight. I can’t start a pack when I don’t even fuckingknow myself. I just don’t know what to do, El. How did you figure your shit out?”
Axel looks at me with pleading brown eyes and all I want to do is comfort my longest friend.