“Dammit, Sunshine,” he whispered, wrapping his arms around her. Her head was against his chest, but that didn’t stop her from finding her best friend’s gaze. “I didn’t mean to burst in here and yell at you. I was just scared, and Hayes wasn’t giving anything away downstairs.”
Margo’s head jerked in my direction. “I asked him not to loop you or anyone outside of Red Snake in on this.”
Carrie and Grayson pulled apart, her falling into his side, his arm going around her. “I don’t understand,” Carrie rasped. “We’re your friends, Margo.”
“No, you’re more than that,” she croaked. “You, Sarah, and Rossy are the family I never had.”
Jesus. She was going to kill me.
“Margo—”
She held her hand up, her butterfly shifting as she swallowed her emotions, putting on a brave face. “No, you can’t—I cannot lose what I’ve found in Astoria.” Her eyes met mine. “I can’t lose any of it.” My chest tightened, knowing this was about more than just her friends. She was saying she couldn’t loseme.“I didn’t escape my old life just for it to ruin my new one.”
“Old life?” Carrie whispered, breaking away from Grayson. She shook her head. “I don’t—I don’t understand.”
“And you never have to,” Margo declared. “All I need for you to do is go home with Grayson, get some sleep, and wake up tocontinue living the life you fought so hard to obtain, Cardinal. You’ve been through hell. You’ve found your peace here, in Astoria, with Grayson. Please hold on to that. Focus on that.”
Carrie stared at her for some time. Then she looked at me. “I’m sorry for cussing at you. Clearly, I thought you were just not telling because of your duty to Red Snake and not because my friend has something ugly and twisted in her head and asked you to protect her boundaries.”
“Cardinal!”
“Carrie,” Grayson warned.
She ignored both of their protests, eyes still on me. “I’m going to untangle it. Right here. Right now.”
Something was happening here. Something monumental. Carrie had a gift. She could see through people if she really wanted to, and right now, she was seeing straight through me and into my heart. It was too late for me to shove her out.
Still, my promise to Margo was more important.
I shook my head once. “Unless Margo invites you to do so, I can’t let you do that.”
“I’m not going to hurt her, Hayes.”
“Hello? I am right here!” Margo barked.
I looked at her then, taking in her fierce beauty, her green eyes, her black hair, and her long body with curves that brought me to my knees, but underneath all of that, there was something even more beautiful: her soul.
“I know you are,” I told her gently. My sweet Temper was about to crumble, her anger faltering, but her boundaries were hers and hers alone. Only she could let down those walls. No one, not even me, had the right to break them down.
She looked panicked. “You just said that if I wanted you to kick them out, you would.”
“And do you want that?” I asked, coming to her. I brushed some hair out of her face. “If you still do, I’ll do it. For you, but I need you to really want that and not let your fear lie to you.”
“I’m not lying,” she snapped, glaring at me.
“Yes, you are,” I murmured. I knew she needed this, but I wasn’t going to push her.
I’d kick Grayson and Carrie out if she really wanted it.
But I knew, deep down, she wanted to fall into Carrie’s arms and sob until she couldn’t.
She needed this.
I traced my finger along her jaw and shifted us so they could only see my back and not her. “You don’t have to tell her anything you don’t want to, but I do think you should at least sit down with her,” I whispered, scanning her eyes.
She broke our gaze and stared at my chest—at my heart. “I can’t have her look at me differently,” she whispered back. It was so quiet I could barely make it out.
“She won’t.”