Both valid reasons. Both true.
Neither revealing the deeper truth pulsing beneath them.
I want a life outside of work. A skill. A connection. A reason to stay that isn’t about duty or service or maintaining my usefulness.
The thought surfaces with unexpected clarity, forcing me to acknowledge what I’ve been avoiding since arriving on the island. In running from Carson, I traded one form of control for another. Not malicious, not cruel, but still a life defined by its margins rather than its center.
A server offers me champagne again, and this time I accept, needing to occupy my hands. The bubbles tingle on my tongue, tart and sweet at the same time.
From across the room, Emily’s eyes meet mine before shifting back to her conversation. The brief connection sends electricity up my spine, equal parts thrill and dread.
Wanting someone with Emily’s gravitational pull is dangerous. My instincts flare in warning, reminding me of every time I’ve mistaken interest for connection, every relationship where power differentials remained unacknowledged until they became insurmountable.
I place my still-full champagne flute on a passing tray, craving clear-headedness. This isn’t Carson. Emily isn’t Carson. The comparison does her a disservice, yet I can’t silence the warning bells every time I consider stepping into the orbit of another Alpha with such obvious strength and certainty.
Still, when a moment opens and Emily stands alone at one of the high tables, I find myself moving across the room before I can second-guess the decision.
My pulse thrums in my ears as the distance between us shrinks.
Fifteen feet away, then ten, then five.
As if sensing my presence, Emily turns as I approach. “Leif. Are you enjoying the party?”
“Yes.” I swallow the lump in my throat. “The Wright Pack went all out. Congratulations on completing Phase One.”
“It was a group effort,” she says, gesturing toward her crew members, who glance my way with varying degrees of curiosity before shifting farther away to give us space.
I take a breath, steadying myself. “I wanted to thank you again for fixing Quinn’s dragon toy. The wing repair was beautiful work. When we packed it the other day, I couldn’t even see the seam.”
“It was nothing.” Once again, she dismisses the praise. “Just a bit of wood glue and patience.”
“Not nothing to Quinn.” I stand my ground despite the urge to step back, to create a safer distance. “She cherishes that dragon.”
At the mention of Quinn, Emily’s eyes light up. “She’s a good kid.”
“She is.” I wet my lips, gathering courage for what I really came to ask. “I was wondering if you were serious… that is, with Quinn starting school next week, I’ll have more free time, and you offered lessons…”
The words tumble out with less grace than planned, and I force myself to stop, take a breath, and wait for her response without filling the silence with nervous chatter.
Emily studies me, her brow furrowing in thought before it smooths out. “I have the next two weeks off before we start Phase 2.”
My pulse quickens with nervous excitement. “If you’re sure you want to give up some of your relaxation time…”
She tucks a strand of silver hair behind her ear. “We can pick a time and start with basic techniques and tool safety.” Her lips curve into something more playful. “We’ll start with a simple project.”
“I’m hoping my mother wasn’t right, and these hands are good for more than books.” Embarrassed heat creeps up my neck. “Fair warning, though. I may be a complete disaster.”
Emily’s face softens. “I can’t imagine you’ve ever been a disaster a day in your life.”
I rub the back of my neck. “You’d be surprised.”
“Well, we’ll take it slow?—”
“Got you a plate.” Jared appears at Emily’s side, a napkin-wrapped bundle of silverware in one hand and two small plates balanced in the other.
His tall frame fits beside her, and he offers the larger plate without asking what she might want. As if he’s intimately aware of her preferences.
“Thanks.” She accepts it with easy grace, their fingers brushing in a casual exchange. “Leif and I were talking about some woodworking lessons during the break.”