And the sight of my strong, capable Alpha reduced to waiting and hoping firms my resolve. This can’t continue. Something has to change, and if Leif won’t initiate that change, then I will.
On sock-covered feet, I walk over to kneel by her next to the couch so we’re at eye level. “This isn’t working. You know it isn’t.”
The resignation that settles over Emily rips open my chest. “What do you want me to say, Jared?”
“I want you to admit how much this hurts you.” My thumbs trace circles on her wrists, her pulse fluttering beneath my touch. “I want you to stop pretending it’s okay when he treats you like an afterthought.”
“This isn’t a single disappointment anymore,” I continue, as a log shifts in the fireplace, sending a cascade of sparks up the chimney. “This is a pattern of him hurting you, whether he means to or not.”
Her focus drifts toward the half-cleared dining table where the evidence of her hope still sits in candle wax and forgotten silverware.
“I keep thinking if I’m patient enough, he’ll feel safe enough to let us in,” she confesses, soft as the snowflakes drifting past the windows. “That if I don’t pressure him, he’ll share whatever burden he’s carrying.”
“How long are you willing to wait?” I ask. “Another month? Six? A year of canceled dinners and broken promises?”
Emily’s fingers twitch in mine as she struggles with the difficult truth. “I don’t know. Maybe I’ve been waiting for permission to demand more.”
“Permission from who?”
“From myself.” She pulls one hand free to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear. “After Auren, I swore I’d never again twistmyself into knots trying to anticipate someone else’s needs. That I’d never again make myself smaller to accommodate someone’s limitations.”
The name sends a ripple of tension through me. I didn’t know Auren when they were together, but I witnessed the aftermath of his manipulation as Emily rebuilt herself, only for Leif to put all that hard work at risk.
“And now?”
“Now I catch myself doing it again.” Her admission comes quiet but clear. “Rearranging plans. Making excuses. Building my hopes around moments he might spare for us between whatever mysterious obligations keep pulling him away.”
I shift from my knees to sit beside her on the couch, the cushions dipping under our combined weight. With gentle pressure, I guide her head to rest on my shoulder, my arm circling her back.
“You matter, Em.” My chin rests atop her head, her silver hair tickling my skin. “Your time matters. Your feelings matter. Your need for honesty and reliability matters.”
Her body softens against mine, tension releasing in small increments with each breath. “Do you think he’s lying? About the school meetings?”
“No, but I think he’s hiding something more,” I answer with care. “I think whatever it is feels too big or dangerous to share, so he keeps us at arm’s length instead. And I bet you it has something to do with Carson.”
Emily’s fingers find the hem of my shirt, twisting the fabric as she considers my words. “And if that’s true? What then?”
“Then he needs to be honest with us.” Conviction hardens within me. “Either he lets us shoulder the weight with him, or he admits he doesn’t trust us enough to.”
The clock on the mantel ticks through several minutes while we sit in silence.
When Emily speaks again, it comes as a whisper, “I love him. But I can barely feel him anymore.”
She lifts my hand to her chest, to the same place where my bond for her hums, and my own chest aches for the dying embers of what could have been.
“This can’t survive if we’re the only ones wanting it,” I tell her.
“No, it can’t.” She straightens. “What are you thinking?”
The determination that’s been building all evening crystallizes into purpose. “I’m thinking it’s time to stop waiting for him to choose us and force him to face what his behavior is doing.”
“You want to confront him.”
No, I’ve already confronted him, and that didn’t work, though neither of us spoke of that meeting to Emily.
“I want to give him a clear choice.” My hands find hers again, gripping with gentle firmness. “All in with us, secrets and burdens included, or step back until he’s ready to be honest.”
Emily’s breath catches, and I know she’s weighing the risk of pushing too hard versus the certainty of more disappointment, more excuses, and more of her light dimming each time he fails to appear.