Jack knew that Amos had far more responsibilities than Jack. It probably made him an adult already.
“Do you want a family?” Amos asked.
“I don’t know. I’m asking myself a lot of questions. Like, Tio Angelo doesn’t have a family,” Jack pointed out. “I mean, not besides my mother and us. I wonder, does it make him happy? Is the business enough for him?”
Amos’s eyes glinted in the moonlight. “I don’t know if I’ve ever seen my mother happy,” he said. “Not till I started paying for more things. Not till I took on some of the slack of her life.”
“I wonder what that means,” Jack said.
“I think it means that life is hard the whole way through,” Amos said. “And it gets harder when you love people, because you want to take care of them.”
“But doesn’t that make life worth living? Taking care of people?”
Amos shrugged. Before he could answer, the Chicago song cut out, and high schoolers streamed into the parking lot to smoke cigarettes and laugh beneath the moon. Amos and Jack would be ready for them, ready to help them ignite their nights. Guilt rubbed Jack’s stomach raw.
Chapter Sixteen
Present Day
When Addison returned home with the news that her father had cheated on her mother and been blackmailed to the point of bankruptcy, she sat in the kitchen with a glass of wine and stared at the wall for a full hour. Her kids were out of the house, at various friends’ places for after-school playdates, her mother was upstairs, knitting to keep from going insane, and her father was in the living room, watching sports recaps and snoring intermittently. She searched her gut for rage toward him. But all she felt was sorrow.
Hugh had betrayed her mother. He’d betrayed the hotel and the previous generations who’d traveled to Hawaii and built the Golden Sunset Hotel. But the worst of it, she felt, was that he hadn’t been able to come clean. He’d cheated, he’d been found out, and he’d let his finances and his precious hotel go, all so that he could be seen as a “good family man” till his dying day. Was it really better to be perceived as a good family man who’d lost everything? A good family man who hadn’t been able to provide for his family?
Money was tight for most people these days, she knew. The economy was in chaos. But she guessed that her father had decided to use that as a shield against what he’d done.
Another question rattled her: was it possible that her father was still seeing his mistress? Was that part of the reason that he’d decided to pay up and get “A” off his back? Did he want to hold on to his mistress so desperately that he gave everything else up?
Addison pressed her forehead against the table and bit her tongue to keep from crying. If only Seth were here. She wondered what he’d tell her. She knew he’d be angry, so angry, but she guessed that he’d have a little bit of compassion for the sad old man who’d done this to them. She imagined Seth saying, He destroyed his life. He has nothing left. I can’t imagine what I’d feel.
Addison groaned. After Seth disappeared, she’d put her trust in her mother and father and into her children. But she knew that she couldn’t trust anyone, not really. Anyone was apt to destroy your sense of safety in the world.
And maybe it was this complete sense of hopelessness that led Addison to pick up the phone and call Charlotte on Nantucket Island.
Addison refilled her glass with wine and slowed her breathing, listening as Charlotte’s phone rang and rang. She kind of hoped that Charlotte wouldn’t answer. If she didn’t, Addison wouldn’t call her again, nor would she answer any additional calls. This was Charlotte’s—and therefore Seth’s—last chance.
But fate was on Seth’s side. Charlotte answered on the fourth ring. “Hello?” She sounded hopeful and surprised. A door slammed somewhere. Addison guessed that Charlotte had taken herself away from other family members, hiding the fact of her “friendship” with Addison.
“Hello?” Charlotte asked again. “Addison? Are you there?”
Addison took a sharp breath. “Yeah. I’m here.”
“It’s good to hear from you. I’d sort of given up on it.”
“I know. Me too.” Addison twirled her hair around and around her finger, till a sting of pain entered her head. “Where are you right now? Are you at the place on Madequecham Beach?”
“We are, yeah,” Charlotte said.
“Must be a cold beach.”
“Freezing,” Charlotte agreed. “We’ve gotten plenty of snow this week. The waves look like frozen slush on some days. Gray and terrifying.”
Addison had never seen the ocean like that, not during the winter, not from here in Hawaii. She closed her eyes and tried to visualize it. “And Seth is there with you?”
“He is,” Charlotte said tentatively.
Addison felt crushed with love and anger. She couldn’t believe he was there, alive and well, not with them, not offering any explanations, not making up for lost time. It was nearly Christmas, for goodness’ sake. Did he even remember his children’s names?
Suddenly, against all her better plans, Addison burst with a single sob.