In a way, she also understood that maybe her godmother was merely trying to ease her nerves about the matter. Arranged marriages were almost never easy, and the circumstances around this were unorthodox. Perhaps Lady Anna was trying to ease away some silently lingering fears or doubts – whichactually did not exist. The only thing that made Agnes slightly curious about their arrangement was the Duke’s motives.
Other than that, she was not particularly bothered about anything else. She had a duty to fulfill, and she was intent on doing just that. The how and why did not matter when she was so close to achieving the goal she had harbored in her heart for two years now.
She would find her sisters if it were the last thing she did.
“Do not worry, dear. He is a very good man,” Lady Anna assured, unaware of how utterly undisturbed Agnes was.
Agnes shifted her gaze to the window of the carriage and hoped that they would arrive at the Forestwood mansion soon so she would be free of this conversation. Scarcely had the thought left her mind when the carriage rolled to a sudden stop. She and her godmother exchanged confused glances and peered out of the carriage through the window, listening as the horses huffed about.
The door to the carriage suddenly opened, and the driver stood, a little wet from the rain that had started a few minutes earlier, his eyes wide with panic.
“My lady – the wheel – one of them is stuck in the mud! What do we do –”
“Charles, breathe,” Lady Anna ordered, and the man straightened, inhaling and exhaling deeply. “There. Better. It is quite all right; we’re not too far from the Forestwood mansion. We would just need to take a secret path to get there.”
She pulled the hood of her cloak over her head and turned to Agnes.
“Dearest, we will head over to the mansion to get some assistance. We won’t be gone for longer than five minutes. Will you be fine by yourself?”
Agnes looked outside, studying the darkening sky and the sound of rain pelting against the roof of the carriage and nodded.
“Yes, I will. Do not worry about me; I will be right here.”
Lady Anna grinned at her. “Excellent. We will be back shortly. Remain in the carriage – lest you come down with the flu.” She turned to the door of the carriage, accepted the hand offered by the driver, and stepped out, closing the door behind her. “It should be around here – ah! This way…”
Her voice faded, and Agnes breathed a sigh of relief, thankful for the break from her godmother’s rambling. Ever since they had gotten into the carriage and began their journey to the Forestwood mansion, her godmother had chattered on and on, dancing between random beads of wisdom on how to attract a man and charm her way into his heart and odd forms of consolation and assurance that everything will go perfectly.
Honestly, she loved the woman to death and was beyond grateful for all that she had done to care for and cater to Agnes’ needs in the two years she had stayed with the lady. She was always thoughtful and kind, ever concerned over Agnes’ well-being – a sentiment Agnes prayed every day that her sisters were also experiencing.
But there were moments when her personality was rather… overwhelming to Agnes. Lady Anna had been born into nobility and raised as the perfect lady. Thetonwas practically her playground with how she frolicked about, ever interested in the latest gossip and trends. It was the life she had chosen. For Agnes, she had also been raised to be the very picture of an acceptable young lady, but her priorities differed from that of other young women her age.
While they spoke about balls and soirees, she was more interested in the responsibilities she was required to uphold in a bid to care for her sisters. They were her whole world, and to an extent… they seemed to be the very reason she existed, not that she minded. For as long as she could remember, she had always been either behind them, watching over them and protecting them or before them, guiding them properly.
When they were separated, she did not know what to do without them, had lost sight of who she really was, without sisters to care for or provide for.
While Agnes appreciated the thought, the only other thing she cared for besides her sisters were horses. She loved horses dearly, and when she was younger, her father had taught her toride and care for horses. They had been offered as mandatory lessons for her and her sisters, but Prudence and Imogen only saw them as that – extra lessons – while she was inducted into a whole new world.
She loved every moment she spent with horses, ever eager to feed them, care for them, and ride them. There had been a vast field of flowers behind their home, and she used to go riding there as early as sunrise. And sometimes, her father joined her, the two of them conversing comfortably. Some nights, she would dream of those moments, of a time when things were perfect, and her life felt whole, and when she woke up, she could still feel the cool breeze against her skin and smell the flowers in the air.
Now, she was donning a whole new role, being required to step even further from her true self. And this – being stuck in the rain, left alone in a place she was unfamiliar with did not seem like the best foot to kick things off for her.
She had been raised to see the value in sincere efforts and hard work and had experienced for herself that success could be yielded if one did one's best and strived for excellence. So, the situation currently did not seem ideal or encouraging, but hopefully, things were only bound to get better. Agnes was sure that all the pieces would fall into their right places if she behaved amicably and performed her duties, and it would only be a matter of time before she achieved her dream.
As she watched the rain pelt the muddy road through the window, she could not help but wonder what the Duke was really like. This would be their first meeting, and all she knewabout him were the awestruck remarks her godmother had told her, which had been fed to her by her dear friend, the Dowager Duchess of Forestwood – and the Duke’s grandmother.
For that reason, Agnes harbored some thoughts that their notions of the Duke might not be as straightforward as they had relayed, but she supposed that did not matter as long as he was of good character.
Agnes had shared a conversation with her godmother on a rainy afternoon sometime the year before that had left a rather odd, lasting impression on her. Lady Anna had taken a long look at her and gently placed her hand over the page of a book Agnes had been reading and asked,
“Pet, what kind of man do you like?”
The question had flustered her so greatly that she had been unable to answer right away. But her godmother had been patient, blinking at her slowly until she answered.
“I… I do not know. An honest man, I suppose. One that is kind and understanding. Loyal and loving – like father was.”
Lady Anna’s gaze had softened, and she smiled. “That’s all very nice, dear, but I was asking more in terms of physical traits. What sort of man do you think you would be attracted to? Physically?”
“Godmother,” Agnes had gasped, aghast. “That’s – I do not – please –”