To his credit, though, Archer didn’t seem deterred.
“Eleven.”
I rubbed at my heart. “I’m sorry. That’s so young, but still old enough to remember.”
“Not as young as Analise,” he said lightly. “A couple years of trying to handle two kids, even with the help of nannies, and she was gone. Took a payout from my father and walked away.”
“I will never understand,” I whispered.
“That’s because you’re a good mom.”
I turned to look up into his face. “Mine died when I was five. Heart attack that was likely caused by the drugs and the drinks she loved.”
His face fell. “Remi, I—” Archer swallowed, giving his head a slight shake. “Fuck, I don’t know what to say.”
“It’s all right. I don’t usually give the full story because it’s easier to say she had a heart attack and leave it at that. It’s a more palatable tragedy, isn’t it?”
We both had had mothers who chose something else over us, and I couldn’t help but wonder how much of our worst impulses, the ones we’d flung at each other so early in this relationship, stemmed from the seeds they’d planted.
His gaze lingered on the side of my face as I set the picture down. “Thankfully, I had my grandparents. My grandma died about two years later—Pops always said it was from a broken heart.”
Archer was quiet for a moment, letting out a sigh before he spoke.
“It’s amazing, isn’t it? How much destruction broken people can leave behind. And they move on without a second thought of what’s trailing behind them as a result.” Archer reached up and tucked some of my loose hair back, his thumb tracing the shell of my ear. My spine shook, but I kept still, stayed unmoving. “You turned out better than I did, though.”
“Archer, your life is hardly a waste. Look at all you’ve accomplished.”
“I’m not fishing for compliments.” His eyes briefly glanced over my shoulder toward the other room, where the Pops and Gavin were watching the birds. When he seemed sure we still had privacy, his gaze locked on mine again, and he dragged his thumb down the edge of myjaw. “In every metric that matters, you’re a better person than me. You burn so bright, and I’m not even sure you realize how powerful it is, being around the kind of light you generate.”
He might not have fit a single criterion on my silly little list, meant to protect myself from exactly the kind of destruction he was talking about, but there was no mistaking it anymore: I’d have an Archer-size hole in my heart when he walked out of my life.
His features were blurry now, and I willed back the tears. When I opened my mouth to respond, he gently pressed his thumb to my lips. “Don’t worry, I’m not flirting.”
I had to blink a few times to clear my vision. “I’m not sure I believe you.”
Archer took a step back, his gaze tracking over my face. “Just stating a fact, firefly.”
A smile threatened before I could stop it. “Firefly?”
“Yeah. Pretty and bright. Everyone loves seeing them around because they make things a little bit more magical.” He tugged gently on the end of my ponytail. “Am I allowed to use that one?”
There was no way I could speak over the emotions wedged tight in my throat, but I managed a shaky nod.
His eyes warmed. “Good.”
Archer’s hand slipped down my arm, the wall of his chest skimming my shoulder when he left the room. I speared my hands in my hair and blew out a slow breath through puffed cheeks.
“Holy shit, I am so out of my league,” I whispered.
Luckily for my rapidly shredding sense of self-preservation, the rest of the items were moved quickly and without further incidents of rampant sexual tension, flirty not-flirting, or big trauma-sharing for either party.
Grant said his goodbyes—we learned he had dinner plans with someone he refused to talk about, but his cheeks turned flame red upon mentioning her—but made sure to take a couple pictures with Gavin, who proclaimed it to be “the best day of his entire life.”
Archer could have left, but he didn’t.
I could’ve questioned it, but I didn’t.
Gavin disappeared to his room to play on his tablet, insisting over and over that he wasn’t tired, despite the zombie-ish look in his eyes. Ten minutes later, I found him fast asleep on his bed.