“You’re fired,” I said easily. “But that’s not why I’m here.”
“Is your sister ever coming back?”
“Doubtful.” I lowered my voice. “And you won’t ask her to.”
His eyebrows rose slowly. “I won’t? It’s amazing how sure you sound.”
“Because she’s almost eighteen, and if you press this, I’ll help her file for legal emancipation.” Despite the shocked huff he let out, I held hisgaze. “She has a job working for me, and you’ve given us plenty of ammunition to tell a judge why she disagrees with your parenting choices.”
The color faded slowly from his face, but I didn’t take much pleasure in it.
Instead of waiting for him to respond, I kept my voice pleasant. “She said something to me yesterday that got me thinking. About how, when I don’t know how to react, I lash out. So do you.” Even though his eyes flickered, he didn’t respond, so I continued. “My mother didn’t, though. She fled. And I lay awake last night, wondering why I’ve never thought to ask you why she left. I never worried about it as a child, and I think it’s because I knew I could never, ever ask a question like that.”
“Your mother left because she couldn’t handle—”
“You,” I interrupted. “She couldn’t handle you. I was a kid who never stepped out of line. Analise was practically a baby. And you were the only adult she had around her. So who’s to blame for that? It’s not us.”
He started to speak, but I held up my hand and took a step closer into his space. “You’ve cost me so much more than you realize. You’ve cost Analise too. And maybe when you’re alone in this big, ugly house and the only people who are willing to be around you are on your payroll, maybe you’ll feel regret someday.”
“Do the dramatic pronouncements make you feel better, son?”
“Shockingly, yes. I should’ve tried them earlier.” I leaned in like I was sharing a secret. “No matter how many times you said it to me, I never once considered saying it back to you.”
“Said what?” he snapped.
“Youare a disappointment. You failed us. The man who expects perfection out of everyone around him is anutterfailure at the thing that matters most, and I needed you to hear that. Not because I hate you, but because hearing it might be the only thing that makes you feel an iota of contrition.”
“You’ll both come back eventually,” he said, voice chillingly calm, but I saw the flicker of doubt in his eyes.
“No, we won’t. You’re not allowed around me anymore. You’re not allowed at games. At events. At anything to do with my life after today. And as soon as I can help Analise get her paperwork filed, you won’t be around her either.” As I looked at his face, I didn’t feel sad. I didn’t feel angry. In truth, I didn’t feel much of anything. “We’re ready to move on, and I hope you do too.”
“Move on?” He laughed under his breath. “I can still send her away. I can still press assault charges. You’ll be ruined.”
“You won’t do any of those things. You were never going to.” His eyes flickered, and I knew I was right. “I couldn’t sleep last night, thinking about all the things I need to undo about myself and how ready I am to make changes. And then it hit me. You won’t send her anywhere, just like you never would have pressed charges. If you did either of those things, it would makeyoulook bad, and that’s the one thing I’ve always been able to rely on when it comes to you.”
His voice was tight and uncomfortable. “You’ve got it all figured out, don’t you?”
“No,” I said. “Not even close. I’ve got so much to fix.” When I exhaled a quiet laugh, my entire frame felt lighter, like I’d released a thousand pounds of weight. “I don’t know if I’ll be able to, but I’m going to try. If it works, I’ll have the kind of life I never thought I’d get. Someone to love me, someone to build a family with.” I shook my head. “Not that you’ll be a part of it. But maybe you’ll get to a point where you’re happy thatI’mhappy.”
Father snorted, a red wash over his cheekbones that gave him away. “Would you even believe me if I told you I was?”
For a beat, I simply stared at him. Slowly, a smile grew.
Then I laughed. I laughed hard. He didn’t understand it, of course, but I didn’t need him to. When the laughter finally faded, I set my hand on my chest and let out a deep, relieved breath. “No. No, I wouldn’t.” Then I tipped my chin. “I’ll send someone for Analise’s things in a few days. See that they’re ready.”
The door slammed shut, and I whistled as I walked back to my truck.
Step two had felt really fucking good.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Remi
“Babe, we just got a really good volunteer application. I think you should meet this one.”
I didn’t take my eyes off the email I was typing. “Just set it on my desk. I’ll look in a little bit.”
Ness chuckled, like she was thoroughly amused that I thought she’d disappear simply because I was busy. “No, I think you should meet them now.”