“Daily?” I blurt.
“Daily,” Lauren says, before ducking her head to suck down a gulp of milkshake. “Not all the time, just when I’m struggling to stay on track. Because while I’m a strong, statuesque boss bitch on the outside, inside I’m a high-maintenance toddler who requires an enormous amount of positive reinforcement and frequent reminders not to ingest toxic substances.”
I smile. “You are not. Inside, you’re a high-maintenance kindergartner.”
Lauren barks a laugh. “Sothat’swhy Mia and I vibe so well.”
“That and your keen fashion sense.”
Her smile deepens, and our eyes hold. Lauren leans in. “I know you’re scared, Thea. But I also know you’re brave. And I know you’ve read enough stories to understand that being brave doesn’t mean you’re not scared; it means, even though you’re scared, you fight for what’s right anyway.”
“Yeah,” I whisper, poking around my milkshake.
She takes a deep drink of hers. Then she frowns down at her glass. “Wait. Didn’t these used to be boozy?”
“They can be.” I slurp a mouthful and swallow. “You asked for the regular ones when we sat down, and I was fine following your lead. I figured, given what you’ve been working on with Frances, that was intentional.”
“Wow, that’s scary,” Lauren says, a little wide-eyed. “I didn’t even think about it.”
I smile. “Frances and her shoe metaphors must really be working.”
“A littletoowell.” Lauren scowls down at her milkshake. “Nonboozy milkshake. What’s even the point?”
CHAPTER 12NOW
July 27, seven days until “vacation”
The first winter after I met Alex, he started a tradition of walking me to work on the days he didn’t have Mia, calling me on the days that he did. I knew I shouldn’t let him, that it was too much to take from a friend, but it was so comforting to walk alongside him, or to hear his voice in my earbuds, as I trudged through the dark, cold mornings, and be reminded I wasn’t alone.
I tried so many times to say he didn’t have to, it wasn’t necessary, but every time, he’d tell me,Three sisters, Ted. I’ve got three of them, and if they were living alone in a city, walking to work before the sun was up, I’d want their friend to see them safely there, too.
The sister angle was my loophole. I could accept Alex’s chivalry because it was brotherly, because in his explanation for his generosity and protectiveness, he’d essentially labeled me a fourth sister, and that made his chivalry safe.
When the outer door to my building comes into view, I missa step and nearly slide down the rest of the way. Argos looks up at me white-knuckling his leash, fighting for my life on the stairs, as if to say,Would you get a grip?
“How,” I ask my dog, “am I supposed to do that when he’s out there waiting for me. And looking like that?” I point to where Alex stands outside my building in a backward Pens ballcap, a faded heather-gray T-shirt, hands in his jeans pockets, staring at the sunrise bathing him in a soft peachy glow.
Argos harumphs.
My heart rate doubles.
As I push open the door, Alex turns and smiles. “Morning, Ted.”
I can’t help but smile back. “Morning, Alex. What…” I let the door fall shut once Argos decides to cross the threshold. “What’s up?”
Alex reaches out a hand toward Argos’s leash. “I’m taking the dog today, aren’t I?”
I nod. “Yeah, but I thought you’d meet me at The Bookshop.”
Alex’s hand curls around mine before he slides the leash up onto his wrist. “And I thought we could walk and talk.”
“Okay,” I say quietly.
Argos takes the lead, tugging toward the crosswalk. Alex and I fall into step behind him.
“I’m sorry,” Alex says, “that I’ve been quiet the past few days.”
“You don’t need to be—”