It was like he could read my mind. Even though I tried not to think about it, knowing someone else’s rush to get to work had upended my entire life for the worse… It was hard not to be bitter. But yeah, that’s what I was. Bitter.
“You’re right,” I said. “I feel…”
“Yeah?”
“Pissed the fuck off.”
Ollie’s mouth quirked up on one side. “I’d be more worried if you weren’t.”
“Really?”
“Yeah.”
“I’m guessing you see this kind of thing a lot.”
“More than I’d like to.”
“So how do you do it? You see all this bad shit every day and you don’t seem jaded by it at all.”
“Trust me, I have my days. More often than not lately,” he said, his focus moving to the window. “But at the end of the day, I’d like to think I’ve helped in some small way. That out of the bad, there’s a bit of good.”
Like a bucket of water had splashed over my head, every wary vibe I’d had about Ollie vanished. With those few words, he’d just given me a peek into his soul, and I knew then without a shadow of a doubt that there wasn’t a malicious or vengeful inch of him.He’s one of the rare good ones, isn’t he? And he saved my life. Holy shit, hesavedme.How did you pay someone back for that? Was it even possible?
There was a sting behind my eyes and in my chest. “Thank you. For helping me just now and for…you know.”Saving my life.
Ollie’s gaze drifted to mine. “You’re welcome.”
An odd thought occurred to me then. “No wonder you came to see me in the hospital. Those flowers you brought…they were from you, weren’t they?”
“Uh…” His face flushed darker than his hair. “Well, I knew you’d had another surgery, so…”
“But then I woke up and had no idea you were the one who saved me. Shit. I’m sorry.” I gripped the back of my neck as my head fell back against the headrest. “I feel like I’ve lost so much.”
“What makes you say that?”
“Until a few minutes ago, I couldn’t remember my accident, and I think that’s what I saw just now. I felt like I was there. And then there’s this chunk of time that’s missing between that day and the day of my surgery. And I can’t explain it, I don’t know what it is, but there’s something in my gut that tells me that I have to keep digging.”
Ollie sat up straighter. “Digging for what?”
“I don’t know, whatever it is. I know that makes no sense. But have you ever had that feeling like you’re forgetting something and everyone around you thinks you’re crazy?”
He stared at me for a long moment and then nodded.
With a sigh, I massaged my temples with my thumbs. “I don’t even know why I’m telling you all of this.” It was strange how easy I found him to talk to, especially considering I hadn’t spoken to many of my closest friends in so long. But I couldn’t seem to shut myself up, and he was a good listener.Maybe Mom’s right. I do need a friend outside of my therapist.“You’re a saint, Ollie. I bet you had no idea you’d signed up for this when you offered me a ride.”
“You seem like you needed to get it out.”
“It’s your fault you’re easy to talk to.”
A smile split his lips. “I’ll take that as a compliment. You can talk to me anytime.”
There it was. That strange niggling in my stomach. Shit, maybe I was hungry. Glancing at the time on the radio, I realized half an hour had already gone by.
“I think I’ve embarrassed myself enough for one day. I should probably go home,” I said.
“Um, about that. Getting you home might be a problem.”
“Why?”