I chuckled as I moved to my side and propped myself up on my elbow to prepare for whatever he had coming my way. “Go ahead. Shoot.”
“Okay.” He clasped his hands in his lap. “When did you know you were gay?”
“That’s it?”
“What? That’s a pretty personal question.”
“The way you made it sound, I thought you were asking for vault-type stuff.”
“Oh, that sounds juicy. Can I have the vault stuff too?”
“Maybe one day if you ask nicely,” I said, winking. “And to answer your question, I think I’ve always known. I don’t remember a moment where it was ever a flashbulb moment for me. It just always was.”
“And your family knew?”
“They knew. They sat me down for ‘the talk,’ you know the one, and man. My dad handled it like a champ.” I ran my hand along the stubble on my cheek as I thought back. “I don’t think he’d ever known a gay man in his life, but he never got embarrassed or held back from telling me exactly what to expect and how to stay safe. I don’t think I ever respected him more than I did then. Sometimes it can be hard in a conservative town to be someone outside the majority box, but I never felt anything other than pride when he looked at me. That goes for my mom, too.”
“They sound like good people to me.”
“Yeah,” I said, nodding. “The best.”
Reid looked down at his fidgeting hands. “I haven’t told my family about you yet.”
“I figured as much.”
“Does that upset you?”
“No,” I answered. “That’s your call. I’ll never pressure you to do anything you aren’t ready to do. I mean, you may wake up tomorrow and decide you don’t want to do this. And that would be okay.”Wrong. It would hurt like a motherfucker.“You’ve had a shit-ton’s worth happen over the last few months, and you’re allowed to take things at whatever pace you’re comfortable with.”
Reid lay down on his side and mimicked my pose, propped up on his elbow. “Ollie?”
“Yeah?”
“I don’t ever see changing my mind about you.”
His words melted my heart, but I wasn’t foolish enough to believe them—not yet.
“Can I ask you another question?”
“No. Yes.”
“How do you… Um. I mean, how does it work when you…” A blush hit his cheeks as he struggled to say whatever he was curious about. “Like do you…or does someone… Ah, shit. I don’t know what I’m trying to say?—”
“Are you asking me if I’m a top or a bottom?”
“Uh… I don’t know what that means.”
No shit, Ollie, of course he doesn’t.“It basically means do I like to fuck or do I like to be fucked.”
“Oh.” His blush deepened. “Then, yes, that’s what I meant.”
“I thought so. And you don’t have to feel shy about asking. That’s a normal question and pretty important when you’re getting to know someone you may want to be with that way. Truthfully, my preference is that I like to bottom—that’s being fucked—but I would switch and top someone I cared about.”
Reid nodded and stayed quiet for a long time, but after a minute passed and he still didn’t say anything, I said, “Is that too much to take in?”
“Huh? Oh, no, no. I was…filing that away for later.”
“Okay. And just so you know, there’s no rush here, okay? I want to spend time with you, in whatever form that takes.”