"So," I say as we crest a small rise that gives us a view of the valley spread out below. "You want to tell me why you're so fired up all the time?"
She's quiet for so long I think she's not going to answer.
"I feel like no matter what I choose, I’m going to lose something important." she says.
I glance over at her. "Yeah. I know that feeling."
"I love this place," she turns in the saddle and gestures toward the ranch spread out behind us. "Love the work, the horses, the way everything connects. But sometimes I feel like if I stay, I'll just be lost in the shuffle. Like I'll never be anything more than Oscar Halloway's youngest daughter who married a local cowboy and had babies and never saw anything beyond these mountains."
"And if you leave?" I ask.
"Then I lose all this." Her voice cracks slightly. "Lose who I am, where I come from."
I understand more than she knows.
"Besides," she continues, "it's not like I'd get the same shot in the world as you have. Not being a girl and all."
"I don't know why you think being a girl holds you back," I say. "You can do anything on this ranch that I can do."
She looks at me like I just insulted her horse. "I can't take over. My name won't ever be on the deed."
I can’t argue with her on that.
"You get choices.” she continues, her voice rising. “And what do you do with all that? You play with your life like it doesn't matter to anyone else."
I hold up a hand. "Kit—"
"You're a selfish son of a gun.” Her eyes narrow as she looks over at me. “Out there risking your neck when you know how important you are, chasing every blonde woman out there." Her voice is shaking now. "You think it's just about you, but it's not. Every time you climb on one of those bulls, you're risking everything this family has built. And you don't even care. You don't care about Mom sick with worry you'll be hurt. You don't care about what happens to this place. You don't care about me and Brook."
Her words settle in my chest like stones.
"You don't know what you're talking about," I snap, my voice harder than it should be.
"Don't I?" She pulls Bandit to a stop, forcing me to do the same. "I know that if something happens to you, this whole place falls apart. I know that Brook's the smartest one of all of us, but she'll never get the chance to prove it. I know that I could work this land better than half the men in the county, but it won't matter because I'm just your baby sister."
I try to think of something to say back, some way to defend the choices I've made, but her words keep rattling around in my head.Selfish.Riskingeverything.
"Stop arguing," I say finally. "Before you say something you'll regret." She's already said things I regret hearing and I'm done listening. Her face falls. Shoot. I don't have the answers she's hunting for.
Kit turns her face forward and won’t look at me.
We continue the ride without talking, nothing but saddle leather complaining and hooves kicking up dirt. I never thought that I might be part of Kit's problems just by being myself; but I am, and that doesn't sit right with me. Doesn't sit right at all.
By the time the Cornerstone Ranch buildings come into view, the worst of the tension between us has ridden off.
"Think that ol' horse can beat us to the fence line?" I test her mood.
Kit's mouth twitches, fighting a smile. "Only one way to find out." She digs her heels in and Bandit takes off. I curse under my breath and give Ace his reins. He runs like there's wolves behind us, and I lean down as I come alongside Kit and give her a grin. She glares, intent on taking down big brother.
We're coming up fast on a gap between two deadfall logs—barely wide enough for one horse. Somebody's gotta give, and it ain't gonna be me. I press Ace into Kit’s line, crowding her space until she has no choice but to back off. But instead of pulling up like any sensible rider would, she digs her heels into Bandit's ribs.
That stubborn little…
The girl's gonna try to beat me through. My gut twists as I watch her grab leather—death grip on that saddle horn like she's fixing to ride out whatever's coming. Bandit lunges forward, and now we're both committed to this fool play.
Ace clears the gap clean, but I'm already hauling back on the reins, wheeling around to see what's left of my reckless baby sister. Figure I'll find her picking herself up out of the dirt, madder than a wet hen and twice as dangerous—if she can get up at all.
Bandit jumps the log like he's some English pure bread and thunders toward the finish line with me staring after them in shock. I kick and Ace is off again, but Kit has a far enough lead that I'm not going to catch her.