As we pull up to the building, Noi finishes his conversation with Pah.
“Maybe I shouldn’t move in with you,” he says, wiping his tears with a tissue from the glove compartment.
“What are you talking about? Of course you should. Nothing’s changed from an hour ago.”
“It feels like I’m saying I need help. I’ve needed help my whole life. I’m so tired of it.”
“Noi, look at me.” When he does, I say, “I love you. I want to be with you all the time. Move in with me. Please.”
Noi blinks, then swallows. After a moment, he nods, and we both get out of the car.
It doesn’t take us long to pack the rest of Noi’s belongings and get them into the trunk of my car. By late afternoon, he’s completely settled in his new home with me. I want to know what Pah said to him, but I don’t want to ask in case it upsets him; so, I wait until he’s asleep and call my father. I leave the apartment to do it, walking a short distance and sitting on the edge of the fountain in front of our building. It’s dark, the clouds blocking the moon’s light. The ever-present sound of traffic at my back, I dial my father’s number.
“Sud. How is Mee Noi?” Pah asks without preamble.
“He seems okay. He’s been quieter than usual.” Suddenly tired, I rub my eyes. “He told his parents not to contact him again, and that he’d be paying his own way from now on.”
“That explains the irate phone message Somchai Somprasong left me, accusing me of turning his son against him,” Pah says.
“It’s like they can’t see the damage they’ve done.”
“People like that never can.”
“Pah, is it true? Did the Somprasongs really pay you to keep Noi?”
Pah’s sigh is heavy. “In the beginning, we did accept extra payment. But after about a year, we told them we didn’t want it anymore. We loved having Mee Noi with us. It wasn’t long after that that we approached them about adoption.”
“And they refused. Was it about control?”
“I’m convinced that’s what it was and still is. I’ve met many people over the years like the Somprasongs. Even though they had no interest in raising him, to give up their rights to their son would make them look weak.”
“I guess you explained about the money to Noi,” I say, thinking about how Noi had cried while Pah was talking to him on the phone.
“Yes. I told him that I’ve never lied about how we feel about him, and I explained that we took the money at first because we saw it as a way to start some savings in case my acting career went awry. But he quickly became one of the family, and it didn’t seem right to take the money anymore. I feel bad that Noi has been going through so much. And now he has to worry about paying for school. I offered, but he won’t accept the money from me. It would have made us the happiest people on earth if we could have adopted him, but those people are too selfish.”
“I hated the way they treated him today,” I say.
“I’m glad you were there for him, Sud. How is your relationship going?” Pah asks.
“To be honest, it’s been slow,” I say, squirming a little. It’s strange talking about my love life with my father, particularly now that Noi is my boyfriend. “We haven’t had much alone time.”
“Maybe it would be a good idea for the two of you to get away. Why don’t you drive to Bang Saen beach for the weekend? I’m sure Noi could use some time to relax.”
“That’s a good idea,” I say.
This leads to an excruciatingly embarrassing conversation about being careful and responsible when having sex with a man just as I would with a woman before we say goodnight and I head back to the apartment.
After a shower, I climb into bed beside Noi, drawing his warm, sleeping body close to mine.
“Mm,” he murmurs groggily. “You smell good.”
Kissing his neck, I say, “I took a shower.”
He turns his head, stretching his neck to meet my lips for a slow, intimate kiss.
“I didn’t mean to wake you up,” I say when we part.
Rolling over, he presses against me. “Hold me.”