Lying in bed in the dark, I start missing Sud. I missed him all weekend, but I know he’s at home now, and I want to be there with him and Ten and Mae and Pah. My real parents texted me that they are in Paris. They now own a house there. After that they’re going to be in South Africa for a month. The main purpose of the message was to remind me to do well in my studies.
I wasn’t even worth an overseas phone call.
Remembering all the nights I cried myself to sleep because my parents didn’t care about me, and how Sud would rub my back while telling me in a soft voice that he would always be with me, brings tears to my eyes. Trembling, I sit up in bed, sorrow and underlying fear bringing a fine sheen of sweat to my skin.
Has something happened to Sud?
Reaching for my phone, I send him a text with shaking hands. Not wanting to let him know I’m anxious, I simply ask if he’s back home and how everyone is.
Minutes seem like years. Finally, I receive an answer that he’s there, and everyone’s good, and that they all miss me and wish I was with them.
My tears spill over as I lie down in bed again. Clutching Fuzzy, I remain awake for a long time.
***
“When’s Sud coming home?” Bua asks me a week later when we’re hanging out in her dorm room. Her roommate has gone home and won’t be back until the weekend.
“Tomorrow, I think.”
My phone vibrates with a LINE message from P’Film.
Bua waves her game controller in the air. “Is that P’Film? Tell him to play something with us.”
While P’Film’s getting on his PC, Bua says, “I’m glad you two are staying in touch. He’s really cute, isn’t he?”
I look up from my controller. “Do you like him or something?”
“What? No! Actually, I thought you two looked cute together.”
I frown. “We’re just friends.”
“No spark at all?”
I think about it. “He’s nice. And, sure, he’s cute. But I don’t feel anything in particular about him. Not now, anyway.”
“Because he’s a boy?” she asks.
“I don’t know. I just don’t.”
“Maybe you will later,” Bua says.
I kind of doubt it. I guess P’Film is nice-looking, but it never crossed my mind I could date him. I want to ask Bua if she’s made up her mind about P’Tam, but I don’t want to get her going. Her friends advised her to play it cool and tell P’Tam she needs time to think, so I’m assuming that’s what she’s doing.
It’s after midnight when we finish playing and I set off for my dorm building.
The moon is hidden behind clouds, and the light outside Bua’s dormitory is burned out, so it’s pitch black where I’m walking between buildings. I turn on my phone’s flashlight, and it helps a little. I have to admit I wish Sud was there to walk with me.
Since I know P’Film’s still up, I call him.
“Hey, what’s up?” P’Film asks when he answers.
“I’m walking back to my building and can’t see for shit.”
“And you’re scared?”
“I just don’t like being alone in the dark. This area between buildings is creepy,” I say, a prickle of unease running up my back. I look over my shoulder, but no one is there. “Just talk to me until I get there, okay?”
“Okay,” P’Film says agreeably. “I got an A on my plant genetics exam.”