I would have loved to take him, but one step at a time. We’d kissed, and other than that night at the top of the stairs, we’d taken it slow, both realising we’d been one step away from a mistake.
But now? His demeanour was different, more open than I’d seen him, especially tonight.
His hands clutched my thighs, but I didn’t relent, raining kisses on his exposed throat.
“I want you,” he said, his voice barely a whisper.
“Then let me take you.”
Chapter 21
Harvey
Lying on my bed, I looked up into the eyes of the man who had completely turned my life on its head. How long had it been since I’d met him? I’d lost track, but in the short time, he’d burrowed into my life, shredding the last of my inhibitions as he went.
Gone were the thoughts of harm, replaced with the notion that I could have what I’d always secretly wanted. I could take my life back, make up for the years of denial all because my head had decided that what I was was wrong.
I knew that wasn’t true. Killian had shown me with his kindness and patience that there was another life to be had, and I wanted it badly.
“Still okay?” he asked, and his callused fingers traced a path down my body. His long hair, now loose, fell forward around his face.
I nodded, unable to form words.
“I want to see all of you.” He slipped his hand under my shirt. I gritted my teeth. If we were to do this, he should see everything. The scars, and the story of my life told by the tattoos I carried.
Some were childish, but as my fear and loathing had grown, they’d become more complex, more meaningful.
“I… I… don’t know what to do,” I stammered.
“Lie back and let me take care of you. Do you trust me?”
Of course I did, or we wouldn’t be here on my bed. This was my sanctuary, my safe haven, the only place I could truthfully call my own.
No one entered this room except me.
“I trust you.”
“Good. Stop me at any time. You promise?”
He was so thoughtful, not once pushing me into something I wasn’t happy doing.
Taking the hem of my shirt, he carefully slipped it over my head. I froze at first, not wanting him to see the scars, but I needn’t have worried.
“My God. You are beautiful.”
I squirmed as his fingers skimmed my side, never once mentioning them. “I’m nothing special.”
“You are to me. I’m privileged you’ve let me see you like this. I’m guessing no one has before.”
I shook my head. “I’ve never been in bed with anyone before. This is all new.”
“I’ll take it slowly.”
I wanted him to, but I was eager for everything he had to offer. The growing bulge in the front of his trousers had me desperate to see him undressed again.
“These tattoos…” His voice trailed off as he bent to kiss them. “And right here is where you’ll put the dragon.” He stroked my chest, his touch so gentle. “You’re so talented. Don’t waste that skill,” he whispered.
I clutched the bedsheets as his tongue did things to my nipples I’d only seen in movies.