The guy deserved the break. He had been through a lot. What with his brother dying, his family disowning him, and years living on drugs and on the streets. Sometimes, something good was just around the corner.
“I’m glad you have so much faith. I’m doubting myself. Why me? There were plenty of great bands there today, much better than me.”
“You forget I’ve seen you sing. The first time I saw you, it wasn’t just the song that attracted me.”
What was I saying? How had I gathered the courage to admit that to him? I wouldn’t have done it last week, so what the fuck had changed?
Killian. That was the only explanation. He was the only difference in my life. Somehow, seeing him and talking to him, bit by bit, he’d begun to break down the barriers I’d erected around my heart. He’d shown me I could have a friend.
But this thing. I could lose him over this, and I’d only just found him. But I was used to loss. I’d cope the way I always had.
“Harvey? Are you still there?”
“Oh, yeah. Sorry. I was just thinking.”
“Fuck, I’m exhausted. I hardly slept last night, and today was long. I need to go to sleep and figure out what I’m going to do. Thanks again for the chat. I really wanted to talk to you earlier, but my phone was dead.”
I brightened at his words. He’d wanted to call me earlier. How did that make me feel?
Jesus, I sounded like Julie, but it made me feel great. Someone had cared enough to call. Although this was new with Killian, I’d begun to realise what I’d been missing all those years since Grandma had died.
I know she wasn’t a friend as such, but she was someone I could talk to. Work colleagues weren’t the same, and I never wanted to be there anyway. I wasn’t the nicest person to work with. I’d erected a screen between me and the outside world. If I didn’t get attached to people, then it wouldn’t hurt so much when they left.
They always left.
Maybe it didn’t have to be that way this time.
“Hey, how about we go out and celebrate? My treat.”He’s just a friend. This is me being friendly.
“You don’t have to pay. We can split it.”
“Nope, I insist. I’m working all day tomorrow, but we could meet up after that if you want to. No pressure or anything.”
“Yeah, sounds good.”
“There’s a small restaurant near work. I’ll make a reservation tomorrow and text you the details.”
The line went quiet, and I had to check to see if we were still connected.
“What if there’s nothing to celebrate? He could have changed his mind.”
“Then he’d be a fucking idiot. Even if he does, we’ll celebrate us being friends. You don’t know what he’s going to say. Don’t jump the gun. I can’t explain it, but I know you have it in you to go far. This guy saw it in you. I believe in you, Killian.”
“One of the very few who do.”
“Well, that’s their loss.” I checked the time. We’d been talking for about twenty minutes. Time had flown by in a flash. Was this what it was like to have a friend? To lose track of time because you were enjoying their company?
“I should go…”
“You should go…”
We laughed. It wasn’t the first time that had happened. Great minds and all that. It was funny how I’d sensed a connection to him that first time outside the bar. I never imagined for one moment that anything would come of it, yet there we were, planning to go out for food.
“Let me know how it goes, and I’ll text you the details. Get some rest, Killian.”
“Yeah, you too.”
They say time flies when you’re having fun, but it fucking drags when you’re waiting for something, and I was waiting for Killian’s call.