The look on her face told me I didn't want to know the answer to that question. She was trying too hard not to laugh.
I finished my bathing, the cool water helping a little to ease the pounding in my head, and followed Zoya’s advice to have a light breakfast and lots of water. I couldn’t say I felt better afterward, I wasn’t as young as I used to be, and hangovers were harder on me as I grew older, but I could at least function to seek out Cedric.
Except, I couldn’t find him. I poked my head into the tent where the language lessons were held, but I must have caught them on a break because it was empty. I checked the village center next, but he wasn’t there either. I was going to check the receiving tent when I finally saw him coming out of it with a younger man at his side. My stomach clenched tightly, fear that perhaps he’d found someone among his own people instead, butbefore I could speak with him, he noticed my presence and spun around, practically sprinting back into the tent to hide.
My mouth fell open. How did I even respond to that?
I decided to wait for him to come back out, but Cedric didn’t make it easy on me. He ate his meals in the tent, somehow managed to sneak out the back for his lessons without me noticing, and when I saw him on his way back, he darted away in another direction while I was waylaid by a few of the townspeople who had questions about the next trip to Al Nuzem.
Frustrated, I decided the next time I saw Cedric, I was not going to let him run away. I needed to apologize at the very least. Whether or not he agreed to spend more time with me, he deserved that much.
Just before supper, I waited near the receiving tent, giving the tent my back as I acted unaware. He would have to come out to get his meal, even if he chose to eat in the tent, and I was going to catch him when he did. I heard the tent rustle, but when he didn't come out the front, I went around the back to catch him in the act of escaping, coming up behind him when I saw him peeking around the side.
“Looking for someone?”
He squeaked and whirled around, but before he could dart back into the receiving tent, I grabbed his elbow, dragging him a short distance away behind a nearby tent so we could speak privately.
“Orthorr–”
“Wait, please,” I interjected, turning to face him fully. I released him, I didn’t want to force him to stay with me if he truly wished to leave, but I hoped he would give me a chance to speak. When he didn’t immediately run, I took it as a good sign and rushed to explain, “I wanted to apologize. I was unfair to you. I–”
“You don’t have to apologize,” he cut me off, his cheeks turning a deep shade of red as he avoided eye contact. “It was my fault.”
“No, ravsol, it wasn’t. I am at fault for being dishonest with you.”
That confused him, and he finally looked up, his eyes searching mine. “Dishonest how?”
“By making it seem like your interest was one sided. It wasn’t. I was conflicted because of my past, but…” I sighed, running a hand over my face roughly. “I realized my late bondmate would be angry with me for denying my interest in you. She never wished for me to spend my life alone.” Taking his hands, I squeezed them gently. “Whether or not we explore this connection, you should know you did not act untoward. I wanted very much to kiss you. I still do. Will you let me?”
CHAPTER EIGHT
CEDRIC
My heart galloped in my chest at Orthorr’s confession. I’d been so sure I humiliated myself, seeing interest because I wanted to see it, not because it was truly there. I was so shamefaced, I avoided him for days, and when I noticed him looking my way, I ran in the opposite direction to escape the humiliation. I thought he’d leave it be, since I’d obviously made things awkward. I didn’t think he was looking at me to make amends.
I really didn’t think he was looking for me to try again.
“You don’t have to…” I murmured. I didn’t want him to kiss me because he felt guilty or obligated. That would only make things worse.
His big hand came up to card through my hair before cupping my face. “I want to. You’re beautiful, ravsol. I haven’t stopped thinking of you since the day we met. I do not ask out of guilt.”
My eyes searched his, looking for the lie, but he seemed completely truthful, his sky blue eyes soft and kind like always.Hope swelled in my chest, followed quickly by nerves. “I… I don’t know how…”
The corners of his mouth kicked up in a small smile. “I can show you, if you wish.”
I was a little worried my heart would beat straight out of my chest, it was beating so fast as I waited for him to make a move. I could tell by the look on his face that he wouldn’t do anything with my express permission first. My cheeks burned as I wrestled with a lifetime of holding back, forcing out the word that came out as more of a squeak than a request. “Please.”
Dipping his head, my eyes fluttered shut as his lips brushed against mine. An entire lifetime of dreaming and wishing didn’t prepare me for my first kiss. His lips were soft, barely brushing against mine before he pulled away again. I chased him, I couldn’t not, lifting onto my toes, and he obliged me by wrapping his arms around me and sipping at my lips.
A small whimper escaped me. It was better than I ever imagined. I was surrounded by him, every nerve ending alive as he pressed himself against me. I felt the scrape of his beard, the gentleness of his hands, the softness of his lips in contrast to the hard length of his body. It was dizzying taking it all in, and I had to grasp his robes to keep myself upright as my knees went weak. Just when I thought it couldn’t get any better, he nipped at my bottom lip, causing me to gasp, and his tongue slipped inside to glide against mine.
I couldn’t even begin to describe the noise I made that time. It was embarrassing, I knew that much, and I wanted to pull away and hide, but before I could, Orthorr pulled me in for more, tangling his tongue with mine in a way that made my belly tighten and my cock swell in my trousers. Pressed against each other like we were, he no doubt felt it, but didn’t pull away or get angry with me. He just kept on kissing me until I felt like I might melt into a puddle at his feet if he ever released me.
I whimpered again when he pulled away, my breath coming short and sharp and my fingers digging into his robes as I attempted to drag him back to me. I felt his chuckle against my lips when I managed to steal another kiss, and he didn’t fully release me even as he straightened enough to pull his perfect lips out of range.
“Your stomach is growling, ravsol. Are you hungry?”
Stupidly, I tried to look down at my stomach, but with the way we were pressed together, I couldn’t see it. The visual was a little heady with my body plastered against his, and I had to bite back a moan at the mental image of being pressed against him much the same way without clothes on.