The door to the study suddenly opened as his mother came in with a worried frown. “Julian, there you are. I was beginning to worry when you were not in your chambers. Have you seen Lily this morning?”
“No, I was just about to change before going to find her. Why? Have you not seen her? Is she not still in her chambers?” He glanced to the left, where the sun was just beginning to rise over the hills in the distance.
His mother shook her head. “I am afraid not. I was worried about the two of you after you both left the ball so early. I wanted to go and check on her, but her chambers are empty, and her bed is unmade.
Has she run away already?
The breath in his lungs stilled as he stared at his mother.
Coming forward, she met his gaze with a deep sense of concern. “You must go and find her at once, Julian. Whatever has happened between the two of you, I am certain that you can work it out. Two of you love each other. I just know it, even if you are unwilling to admit it.”
A soft smile played around Julian’s lips as she sighed. How could he tell his mother that he did love Lily, but there was every possibility that she did not love him back? At least not in the way that he longed to be with her.
“I will go looking for her at once. Perhaps she has gone into the village for a walk.” He swallowed hard when he saw the relief in his mother’s eyes. Another small piece inside of him broke when he realized just how much his family had come to care for her as well. There would be more than one heart broken if she had decided to leave.
“Very well, I shall leave you to it then, but please let me know once you have found her. I need to know that everything between the two of you is as it should be.” She gave him a final, sad smile before turning and leaving the study.
Julian stood still for a moment, staring at nothing in particular. She had not been gone for very long, and his life already felt emptier. It was as if she had consumed a part of himand he no longer felt whole when she was not around. He was not certain what he would do if she had decided to leave him. His feelings for her far outranked those he had felt for Anne. He had not wanted to fight for Anne, but Lily was someone else entirely.
He was about to leave his desk and freshen up again when Eleanor suddenly appeared in the doorway clutching a roll of parchment to her chest. “Julian, may I have a word with you?” she asked softly, closing the door behind her without waiting for a reply.
Feeling his body stiffen, Julian clenched his jaw, not knowing what to expect.
She came toward the table with the scroll in hand, holding it out to him as she spoke. “Lily asked me to give this to you this morning. She said she is sorry, but she could not face you again knowing that she had lied to you.”
Doubt instantly crept into his mind again despite knowing how many lies Eleanor had told.
Have I been wrong?
He held her gaze for a long pause before taking the rolled-up parchment and untying the black ribbon.
“It is a decree of annulment. She no longer wants to stay married,” Eleanor blurted out.
His hands froze with the parchment between them as she looked up in shock. He did not want to believe her.
It cannot be.
He looked down again just as his breath returned and opened the roll of parchment.
The words written in official lettering were clearer than day. An official decree of annulment that needed to be signed.
“I know this must have come as a shock to you, but I did try to warn you at the ball, Julian. Lily was never what she seemed…” Her words trailed off on a sad note as if she were feeling sorry for him.
His fingers shook lightly as she read the words, hardly taking anything in that Eleanor was saying. The world seemed to be fading around him as she took a deep breath. He had only just gotten the papers, and already, it seemed as if he could not picture his life without her.
But if this is what she wants…
Tearing his eyes away from the parchment, he looked up at Eleanor, who seemed poised to say more.
“Julian, I…”
“Please leave me be for now. I must think,” he cut her off sharply and dismissed he with a wave of his hand.
Waiting until he was alone in the study again, Julian dropped the decree on his desk and sat back, running his hand over his stubbled chin. He wanted to fight for her, but if this was what she had wanted, then there was nothing he could do besides set her free.
He would sign the papers if that was what she truly wanted.
***