Ruthie looked dubious. ‘How am I going to look fabulous if I’m soaked through and wearing goggles and flippers?’
‘I don’t think we need to go quite that far,’ said Tim, faltering.
I tried to think – we needed Ruthie to be behind this, otherwise there would be no point doing it. She had a sour face at the best of times, and we wanted to show our viewers what a good time she was having, not leave them feeling as though they’d just watched her being sentenced to life imprisonment.
‘Think of it this way, Ruthie: it would look great on your showreel,’ I said, coming at it from a different angle, i.e. one that would benefit Ruthie. ‘Imagine this: a fun, full-of-energy segment that will prove to those big bosses over at ITV that you’re not simply a static presenter who stands there looking beautiful, but that you’re a real, go-getting,risk-taking reporter who will do anything,anything, for the best shot.’
Lou looked at me, clearly impressed.
‘Hmmn,’ said Ruthie, sounding more interested. ‘You’ve got a point, actually. My showreel is a bit samey.’
‘There you go,’ I said. ‘What about kayaking? That way, you can stay perfectly dry, and we don’t need to go too far from the shore, just far enough out so that it looks like you’re in the middle of the loch. Would that work, Lou?’
‘Absolutely,’ she replied, joining in with the pep talk. ‘You probably wouldn’t have to go out much further than the end of the pier.’
Ruthie sighed, touching her hair with delicate, manicured fingers. ‘If you think you can get some nice shots out of it, then why not? But I don’t want to be out on the water for very long. Isn’t there supposed to be a monster out there?’
I smiled kindly at her. ‘That’s Loch Ness, Ruthie. We’re in Loch Lomond.’
‘Right, that’s settled, then,’ said Tim. ‘Maddie, can you go and speak to that man over there and tell him that we need to take some kayaks out later today. Talk him into giving them to us for free in exchange for publicity.’
This was the part of the job I hated: the hustle, the asking for favours when I knew they wouldn’t be getting anything in return. I just didn’t understand how Tim expected these people – who had businesses to run – to disrupt everything, their whole working day, without getting so much as a token payment for their trouble. It wasn’t like they’d want to do it for the glory of appearing on the UK’s most popular travel channel.
‘Er, and what publicity would that be?’ I asked.
‘Well, his kayaks will be on screen, won’t they?’
I bit my lip. ‘Yeah, but unless we get the name of hiskayaking school in shot, it’s not exactly going to promote it, is it?’
‘Fine!’ huffed Tim. ‘We’ll do a shot of his stupid, tatty shack with all the boats inside. And tell him we’ll try to get the name above the door in shot, but no promises.’
I looked over at the diving instructor, who I presumed was also the owner. ‘I think he’s in the middle of something,’ I said. ‘I can pop back in a bit.’
‘You’ll have to interrupt him,’ said Tim. ‘We need to get a schedule in place for this afternoon, there’s no time to waste. Come on, Ruthie, let’s go and get you warmed up in the bar, shall we?’
Lou tutted as the two of them picked their way up the beach, as though they were allergic to sand. ‘Those two are fucking hard work.’
I shook my head. ‘Talk about highly strung.’
Lou gave me a look as she started to pack her camera away. ‘I’ve got a bone to pick with you,’ she said.
‘Another one?’
She smiled at me. ‘I’m not that much of a nag, am I?’
‘No comment,’ I replied.
Lou always meant well and, admittedly, sometimes I needed a little push in the right direction, but she could go on a bit sometimes. We couldn’t all be as vocal as she was; in fact, sometimes she could benefit from keeping things in her head and not spouting them out of her mouth before she’d had a chance to think better of it. Her road rage, for example, was off the scale.
‘I was just going to say …’ she ventured.
‘Here we go,’ I said, bracing myself on her tripod.
‘That you should stop letting Tim steal your ideas and passing them off as his own. That’s how he’s got to producer level, by taking other people’s stuff and running with it withsuch assurance that nobody thinks to question it. In fact, I wouldn’t be surprised if he’d convinced himself it was actually his idea in the first place.’
I groaned, embarrassed that she’d noticed, even if she was my friend and therefore totally on my side. ‘I know. It’s just that he said there’s a promotion coming up and I—’
‘Do you really think he’s going to put in a good word for you? Tim? Do something selfless, say nice things about actual other people? No chance,’ scoffed Lou.