“Can I please touch you?”
I don’t even care if I sound like I’m begging because I am, and I would.
She opens her eyes, looking down at me. Her stare is void of any emotion, and I wonder if I broke her.
I wait for any response before she snaps out of it and takes a step toward me. When she does, I grab her hand, guiding her into my lap. She doesn’t resist, and I’m relieved as she sits, stretching her legs out in front of her on the other side of the couch.
“I need you to know everything I said to you after you came back home that night down by the beach was real. I had planned to tell you everything when we stayed at the beach house. I wanted a chance somewhere away from everything to come clean, but when you told me your fears, how you were still scared to give in, I knew it wasn’t the right time. I needed to show you how I felt about you, I needed you to believe me when I told you I loved you. It’s just, there’s never a good time to sit the person you love down and tell them the things you know will break their heart. I’m sorry though, for not telling you sooner. Hell, I’m sorry I made the bet in the first place, but I’d never want to hurt you. Never! Do you know how much it gutted me when I found out you left?”
I wrap my arms around her waist, holding onto her, not wanting to let her go. She relaxes a little more. I stare at her as she traces the collar of my shirt, hoping she’ll look at me. I want to kiss her so damn bad, but I’m trying like hell to prove this isn’t about wanting to get in her pants, even though seeing her tonight, being near her, touching her is driving me out of my damn mind.
“So much good has happened to me since you came back into my life, with a smart mouth full of sass. The guys and I were offered a record deal. For the first time ever, I’ve found someone, besides my mom, who means more to me than my own life. I’ve been a selfish asshole for the last twenty-three years, but it’s different with you. I want you next to me when we release our first single when our record comes out. I want you with me when we go on tour. I know I’ve given you every reason not to trust me, to run away, but please, give me a chance.”
“A chance for what? Brix, do you really think we’d be able to do long-distance when you’re out traveling for shows, or when you go on the road? I mean, look at us. We’ve spent more time fighting with each other than anything at all.”
I grin. “We are good at fighting, yes. But think of all the fun we’ll have making up.”
She smacks me on the chest, pushing me away, as my hold on her tightens. She shakes her head, and in the mirror in front of us, I can see her rolling her eyes before a subtle grin lines her mouth.
“We’ll figure it out. We can FaceTime every night. I’ll make plans to come see you as often as I can. You graduate in what five, six months?”
She nods, turning to look down at me.
“Ivy, do you love me?”
Her face softens. My breath is caught in my throat, waiting for her to answer as she nods her head once again.
“Tell me,” I whisper.
“I love you, Brix.”
Wrapping my hand around the back of her head, I kiss her. I kiss her like she’s the air I need to breathe, like she’s the blood pumping through my veins, and the heart beating in my chest. Like she’s the only thing in this world that means anything to me, and I hope like hell she feels it, too.
Pulling back, I press our foreheads together and whisper, “I love you, too. I promise I’ll never let you forget how much.”
Tears fill her eyes once again as I kiss her. This time softly, as she quickly moves to stand and climbs back on top of me, facing me.
My hands roam over her body, her thighs, over her waist up toward her chest, sliding back down to her hips to pull her closer to me. It’s been too long since I’ve been near her.
I’m going to show her how much I’ve been missing her.
Twenty-Eight
Brix – Six Months Later
“Do you see her?” Charlene leans closer to ask.
Looking down from the stands into the crowd of graduates, my eyes roam for any sight of my girl. She’s hard to spot in a sea of people wearing the same cap and gown, but I know if I spot her, I’ll know it’s her.
“There she is,” I say, pointing, as Ivy looks up at us. Even from here, I can see the smile beaming on her face as she takes a seat.
Today’s the day we’ve been waiting for. The last six months haven’t always been easy, especially the last couple of weeks with things getting busy for the band. We’ve had to do a lot more traveling as we’ve been working on our record.
It’s cut into my time to see Ivy, but she’s been so reassuring. There hasn’t been a night where we’ve gone to bed without speaking to each other. Most nights we FaceTime when I’m back in my room away from everyone else.
On the nights when the ache of not being near her stings the most, I love her in only the way I can being far away. Watching her touch herself for me, letting me see her in the most intimate of moments. Fuck, I don’t know how I got so lucky with this girl.
Now, she’s finally graduating, and I won’t have to be away from her as long. I told the label I had to leave to come back to North Carolina this week to see her. There’s no way I was going to miss seeing her graduate. She’s been there for me every step of the way since we got back together, and I wasn’t going to miss this milestone for her.