I really don’t want to see anymore humans after what happened with the dressmaker.
The silken blanket is soft against my skin, and I pull it tighter as my thoughts encroach on my solitude. The first few hours, I wasnumb, and now, I am faced with my new reality once again. This time equipped with better information, but just as desperate as before.
A deep ache inside of me longs for home. My throat tightens when I remember the easy, simple friendship I’d made with my community. I think of my students. Small hands patting my thighs. How it healed something in me to be with children. Was it really just months ago that I was at the mating festival, still hoping to find someone?
That memory reminds me of Diego, the first man the curse made me kill. Resentment and regret flood through me, along with the feeling of violation that continues to linger in my insides, and now even on my lips where Arion kissed me.
I can’t look forward to children anymore, even though I’ve never been closer.
Cursed One is silent. Content to listen and watch as my mind churns.
I have already given so much of myself to Arion. Would anything be left at the end of these two weeks?
The door opens without a knock. Silk whispers and perfume cut through the morning chill as three women sweep into my space.
I immediately recognize the three ladies-in-waiting I was introduced to yesterday. Each holds herself with an air of grace and beauty that belies her magical heritage. I watch them, a little jealous of the way they fit into this place.
Gratitude that I have been spared the need to bribe one of them washes over me. But these women are still important. They can teach me to fit in, which would afford me another measure of safety.
Merlina does not bother with a greeting. “On your feet,” she says, eyes flicking over the blanket at my shoulders, the bare curve of my ankle where the chemise rides up. “You have a full morning.”
Slowly, I stand, feeling stripped bare by their demanding tone and abrupt requests.
Kiala closes the door with a click. Eslina lingers near the hearth, gaze dropping to the gown from last night hanging like a green river over the dressing stand.
Who hung it up after the attack? I wonder.
“I hope you are happy with your choice,” she says, almost to herself.
I stare at the gown, thinking. Remembering. Palms sweating.
“The gown is beautiful. I’m very…satisfied with my choice,” I lie, standing. The cold stone shocks the thin soles of my feet. “What do you mean, a full morning?”
“We will be spending the morning with your preparation,” Merlina replies. “Presentation follows preparation, and your first formal presentation is imminent.”
“My presentation?” Wasn’t that last night? I met so many people. Even if I didn’t know who everyone was, I was almost sure that’s what was done.
Kiala’s mouth shapes something like a smile. “That was merely a dinner. Your presentation to the court should be a more formal occasion. The king has planned a masked ball.” Then she points toward the dressing area, and I walk behind the privacy screen. I find another gown, one much simpler in design but still elegant, with deep purple hues and small silk flowers. I hadn’t noticed it before, and I wonder how it got there.
As I dress, I think of the masked ball. I’m not unfamiliar with the concept. Many people throughout the ages have turned to costumes to dress as members of their lore or legend. So that is what the king had meant when he mentioned the celebrations leading up to the wedding.
Wearing pretty gowns is easy, but it’s rarely all that’s expected of you on the arm of a powerful man.
As I slide the new dress over my skin, a task I wonder if the others are supposed to help me with, I envision dancing with Arion again, as we did the first time we met.
Teo had asked me to help convince the Elf King that the humans were valuable and that he would need help protecting them, so we could be relocated from our slave-home in Zlosa. Arion was meant to look at the humans and find value in us so that he would lend the Enduares troops. I was meant to charm him.
It’s ridiculous to consider that now. What began as accompanying him to Estela’s wedding, something meant to end in dancing,had quickly turned into something awful when he betrayed us for the first time and let in a group of giants to destroy the city. All of this, before and now, is a dance. A game. I need to pay attention and learn the steps.
As I step out from behind the privacy screen, I feel as though I’m held in place, this time by three elven women who despise me.
Merlina claps twice. Two servants slide in, carrying a lacquered wooden case, a narrow stool, bundles of combs and pins, a coil of ribbon. “It’s time to go,” she quips, already turning.
And then we are out the door, with my hair still unkempt. I can only imagine what my face must look like after a night without sleep. Did they disapprove of my freckles?
The corridor air pricks gooseflesh along my arms and legs. We move down a hall I recognize, and then I am taken through a private passage and into a long arcade where the morning light pools across the floor in white rectangles. Beyond the arches is a courtyard already in full movement.
A ring of courtiers has formed beneath a tangle of climbing roses, and my skin burns seeing their perfect faces and knowing how changeable and unattractive humans look in comparison.