"Oh."
He rolls the paper up and hands it to me.
"No matter. We will go back now. Are you hungry?" He takes my hand and starts moving.
I stare at him in utter disbelief. "Wait," I quip.
He stops, turning.
"You can’t be serious. You don’t need to entertain the idea of this silly ritual for me. I know we’re friends now, but I am weary. I want to go home. You should do the same, I know you didn’t want to come.”
"Who told you that?"
"You did."
His jaw tightens, but then he mutters."Dalkhir von torath."
My brow furrows, not fully catching the heavily accented enduar. "What does that mean?"
"Come with me to eat before you faint," he grumbles.
I stand my ground.
“No. It’s been a long day."
His stare darkens. "Why won’t you come? Surely I was agreeable enough last night. I promised to be kinder.”
"Because going with you would mean something to the others looking."
The air goes still.
Vann freezes, body preternaturally tense. He turns, his movements slow, deliberate. My stomach flips over itself a half dozen times.
"There is more to life than endlessly chasing matehood" he says, voice low.
I meet his gaze, unflinching. He doesn’t know what being blessed and chosen means to me. He doesn’t know all the scars I carry.
And I am not sure I want to tell him.
“But the purpose of this festival is just that. Since we don’t have any signs that we are to be bound, I would like to leave now and we can talk later, when I feel less overwhelmed.”
He just stares.
Disbelief lingers in his expression, but I step back, taking my hand back. A long moment stretches between us before he straightens, composing himself.
"Fine," he says coolly. “I will see you later.”
“Until then,” I murmur. Then I turn, pushing into the crowd, willing the weight of his stare to fade.
But it doesn’t.
And as I approach my final tent, my heart plummets.
It is empty.
Another man gone. Another missed chance.
My stomach rumbles, and I realize how hasty I was with Vannearlier. He was being kind, and I wasn’t. I should apologize, and perhaps he’ll offer me something small to eat.