“Th-thank you.” Millie couldn’t say the same. She didn’t care for the viscount, nor did she think they had much in common. She couldn’t imagine spending more time with him, let alone the rest of their lives. What would they speak about across the dinner table? And the idea of performing wifely duties in the bedroom with him was enough to make her shudder. She had no desire to kiss him or be intimate in any fashion.
The knot of dread in her stomach was enough to make her ill. How had her sisters managed to accept such a fate? Had they never had feelings for another, making it bearable?
Though tempted to ask, what difference would it make? She felt as if she were on a train bound for a destination she didn’t want to venture to, and there were no stops to allow her to disembark.
She couldn’t deny Winston had thoroughly caught her affection. She need only think of how excited she would be if he were the one calling and sending flowers. Her feelings when he was near, both physical and emotional, were in stark contrast to how she felt with Dunthorpe.
“Wait until I tell your father. He will be so pleased.”
“Mother, could we slow down...plans with the viscount?” Millie asked. “I am in no rush to marry.” Not him, anyway.
“Momentum is on our side, and we must take full advantage of it.” Her mother shook her head. “There are many young ladies out there in need of husbands, and here you are, lucky enough to have caught a gentleman’s interest at your age.”
Millie frowned. Though she knew Society agreed, she would’ve thought her own mother would consider the man the lucky one. Nor did she appreciate the suggestion that her age was advanced, even if her sisters all had been married when they were younger.
“I realize you have danced with the Marquess of Linford once or twice, but don’t allow that to give you false hope. Everyone knows he doesn’t intend to marry.”
Before she could find a way to further protest, her mother continued, “Marriage is something you have looked forward to your whole life. I know it’s concerning when presented with a new experience with which you are unfamiliar, but you will soon become accustomed to it. Give yourself time.”
Millie stared, wondering if her mother knew her at all. As a girl, she had never mentioned a longing to marry because she had never felt one, especially after watching her sisters’ less-than-ideal matches.
She hadn’t longed for marriage until her attention had been caught by Winston.
Before he entered her life, she had been resigned to enduring the same fate as her sisters or perhaps settling for spinsterhood, but she hadn’t truly contemplated what those options might mean until now.
As if realizing Millie remained unconvinced, her mother sank into the chair beside her. “Once you and Dunthorpe spend more time together, you will see. It helps if you look for traits to admire in him.”
“So I’m to convince myself that I’m attracted to him?”
Her mother’s expression gentled. “Sometimes that’s necessary. And it certainly makes duties in the bedroom easier.” She looked away, seeming suddenly interested in the flowers.
Millie’s breath caught, seeing her mother in a new light. Was that what she’d had to do when she and Father had married? The question had her reviewing her parents’ relationship with fresh eyes.
Perhaps Millie was naïve to hope she might escape an arranged marriage if not only her sisters but also her mother, had endured one.
“I don’t think we would be having this conversation if not for those friends of yours in the literary league,” her mother continued. “They have given you ridiculous ideas.”
Millie stiffened, unwilling to allow any derogatory comments about her friends. “That’s not true. They have given me hope for a happier future because they have all found love. Why wouldn’t I want that for myself as well?”
“Love is not practical.” Her mother’s lips pressed together in a tight line. “Not for us. Your cousin Prudence is a good example. She and Viscount Winstead might think they’ve found love, but they would be better off if they’d been practical and chosen partners with wealth. They have a long road ahead if they’re forced to scrape by.”
Millie could hardly believe her ears. “The viscount has already received investment offers for his windmill design. They have every reason to expect a bright future. All the more so because they have one another and the love they share.”
Color was high in her mother’s cheeks as she stood. “We shall see. But I want more for you than trying to make ends meet. An arranged marriage was good enough for your sisters and it will be good enough for you.”
“Mother, I only wish to—”
“The time for wishes has passed, Millie. I’m sorry to be so blunt, but we must be practical and think of the future. You’re not getting any younger. Your father and I expect you to be betrothed by June, preferably sooner.”
Millie’s stomach plummeted and her heart along with it. “That’s less than two months from now.”
“I am aware. And now you are as well.” Her mother lifted a brow. “The Radcliff ball is in two days’ time, and I expect that Dunthorpe will be in attendance. You will do your best to charm him and encourage his suit.”
Millie couldn’t bring herself to agree, not given the lump in her throat. But when her mother continued to stare, she reluctantly nodded, feeling much like a bird trapped in a cage with no hope of escape.
She wasn’t betrothed yet, she reminded herself. Perhaps another bold move was necessary to see how Winston might react. If she had to marry Viscount Dunthorpe, she would do so knowing she’d done everything she could to help Winston see her as a potential wife and partner.
Winston held his patience while he waited in the long reception queue to greet Lord and Lady Radcliff then, at last, entered the ballroom. He tried to act casually while he perused the room for Millicent, but he was anxious to see her and had high hopes she would be there.