When I suggested otherwise, the police officer who came to question me muttered something under his breath about a head injury, then left shaking his head. Yes, my memories were a bit fuzzy, but not enough to have made up a whole freaking person. Realizing the accident may not have been an accident, survival instincts took over. I shut my mouth and didn’t speak his name again.
From the beginning, there were certain aspects about his life Rogan wouldn’t discuss. His job, for one. Obviously he had a source of income, since he always paid when we went out. The particulars were irrelevant to me. I knew everything I needed to know to fall head over heels in love with the man behind the wall of secrets. Nothing else mattered, so long as we were together.
Which was why I went directly to his place after being discharged from the hospital. If it hadn’t been for the fact my key opened the door, I would’ve thought I’d gone to the wrong apartment. Other than the smell of fresh paint in the air and the new hardwood covering the floor, the place was completely empty. It had obviously been gutted. Which was exactly how I felt when I left.
Still, I didn’t give up hope. The twins became my refuge. Knowing I carried a part of him with me was the only way I survived. Day by day. One foot in front of the other. Everything would be okay once they were born. I’d give them the best life possible, even if I had to do it alone.
Finn insisted on being in the delivery room with me, a decision I’m sure he regretted after I took a swing at thenurse and punched him instead. I wasn’t normally a violent person, however, she had it coming. The tension broke when Rogan James came screaming into the world. I bawled louder than my newborn son when I told my brother what I wanted to name him. He wasn’t happy with my decision, thought I was setting myself up for a lifetime of torture. I disagreed.
Reagan Leigh followed her brother nine minutes later. She was so quiet, I started to panic, until the doctor reassured me she was perfect. And she was. They both were. Twenty fingers, twenty toes, and their daddy’s ice-blue eyes. They were the conclusion to our love story, without the happily ever after.
Through every milestone he missed, my heart continued to burn bright for Rogan while the same mantra played on repeat in my mind.
He’ll come back. He’ll find us.
I just didn’t think it would take quite so long. Or that his name would actually be Duncan Palmer,not Rogan James. The whole name thing was going to take some getting used to. But he was here, well technically, not here-here, since he left three seconds after our reunion.
“You doing okay, honey?” Waverly asked through the bathroom door.
Waverly was my soon-to-be sister-in-law, since Finn proposed about two hours ago. I adored her and so did my kids. Even Reagan, who was painfully shy, had warmed up to her quickly. Who wouldn’t? Way was beautiful, smart, and had a heart of gold. Best of all, she was a kick-butt FBI agent, who risked her life to save my brother. I’d forever be in her debt.
Funnily enough, she also happened to be Rogan––er––Duncan’s best friend-slash-boss. It felt like I was playing theSix Degrees of Kevin Bacon, except Duncan was the one everyone connected back to instead of the famous actor.
“Define okay.”
Whatever the definition, I was far from it. In truth, I was terrified. What if he didn’t want us? What if he didn’t want me? Would I be able to stay in Huntington? My head spun so fast with questions I thought I was going to throw up. Hence my reason for being in the bathroom.
“I’m coming in.” She opened the door enough to squeeze her body through, then quickly closed and locked it. “Your brother is playing hide-and-seek with the munchkins. I figured we wouldn’t want them barging in on us.”
“Thanks. I probably look like heck.”
“Never.” Waverly sat next to me on the ledge of the garden tub. “So, you and Duncan.”
“Yeah.” I slumped forward, propping my elbows on my knees.
“Do you want to talk about it?”
“What’s there to say? We met, we fell in love, he lied, and I haven’t seen him in over eight years. The end.”
“I’d ask how pissed you are, except your answer kinda gave you away.”
“Here’s the thing.” I turned my head to look at her. “I’m really not. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not thrilled with the fact he lied, but I’m also not fuming. To tell you the truth, I’m fairly numb at the moment.”
“Numb is normal. You’ve been through quite a shock.”
“He was in the FBI back then, right?” She nodded. “What if our entire relationship was just part of his cover? I want so badly to believe what we had was real, that he’s the same man I fell in love with, even if his name is Duncan and not Rogan.”
“There’s one thing I know with absolute certainty. You were his world. If you believe nothing else, believe that.”
“How do you know?”
She sighed, wrapping me in a hug. We stayed that way for a few moments before Way broke the silence.
“Duncan and I met during an op about seven years ago. We just clicked.”
From the way she’d spoken about him previously, I knew they were close. The question rolling around in my head at the moment was just how close had they been? Did they ever take their friendship to the next level?
“Did you and he…” I let the question hang.