Liam folded his arms on the table. “Everything imploded. It didn’t work without Ben.”
There was that silence again. Why was Benson so allergic to it?
“I can be honest about myself,” Liam said. “I don’t mind other men in my bedroom. I prefer a beautiful woman between us, sure, but as you said, love, you know my dirtiest secrets. It gets me hot knowing that other men love the same woman I do. I get off on worshipping gorgeous women like you with other studs.” He said it so casually! Absolutelyno shame!What was that like, anyway?I can’t… this guy…Five years since everything “imploded,” and Benson still couldn’t believe Liam’s youthfulcandor. “I’m not really cut out for monogamy in the long-term. Not a need for other women, love, but I like guys, too.”
“Whoa,” Eden said. “You’re bi?”
Liam crossed his arms and slumped in his chair. He tried so hard to project confidence, but Benson knew the truth.It’s because I’m here. He’s losing it because of me.Which didn’t exactly inspire confidence inBenson,either.
“Yes. As Ben can attest.”
“Uh, I gotta see this.”
“Do you think this is a side-show or something?” Benson asked his girlfriend.
Yet she was still smiling, still playing with her hair, and still sitting up straight so her breasts kept jiggling in front of him. “I hadn’t guessed. I mean, I knew you werecomfortablearound other men, but I thought that was just being comfortable in your masculinity. Like, really comfortable.”
“Same difference to me.”
“But being bi implies that youlikemen. In that way.” Eden kept waving her hand. Benson now knew this was one of her tells when she worried that she had ruined the moment. “Like you’d be fine with going one-on-one with a guy.”
“You make it sound like I haven’t.”
“Yes, Liam likes men, let’s all move on,” Benson said.
Both Liam and Eden looked at him as if he suddenly sprouted a second head. “Problem with that?” Eden asked.
“Yeah, Ben. Problem?”
Fuck you both for this.No, not Eden, but mostly Liam. Eden was giving him the hardest look of her life, though.Waiting for me to expose myself as a bigot, surely.And he would have no room to talk. “No problem,” he said. “I just think we should move on.”
“I bet you have a crush on Ben after all this time. I know I would,” Eden said to Liam.
“He’s quite a guy, yes.”
Nothing was teasing or mirthful in that tone.I’ve done it again. I’ve ruined it again.
He had once again ruined something between a couple who should have just been together.Sydney. Liam. Now Eden.
“I moved away because it was too difficult being around Ben anymore,” Liam said after they all had a few more bites of dinner. “It was too awkward bumping him into the same places we always liked, and hearing about him through our mutual friends in different circuits. Like, could I avoid what he did for a living? Obviously. But when you’re in a situation like that, and it’s over… it’s like any other relationship. You just want to start over somewhere else.”
Benson thought about that for a second. “I didn’t know that’s how you felt.”
“Well, yeah. It was.”
“You would have rather been in that hellhole called LA than in the same city as me.”
“Thanks for catching up, Ben. Thought it was pretty obvious when I skipped town.”
I knew. Deep down.Benson would have done the same thing if he didn’t have family ties to the area. Drew alone would keep him nearby, no matter if he had shared custody or not.And I did. So I really couldn’t leave.Liam had been right about Benson’s issues with getting married again. And not siring more kids was his biggest boundary of all. Libby, their last shared third, wanted to marry and start a family.I was shocked that Liam considered it.Later, Benson realized that Liam was doing anything it took to keep them together. That was the kind of man he was.
Wasn’t that the kind of man Benson had aspired to be?What the fuck happened to me…What kind of father was he? Professional? If he couldn’t mind his social contracts…
“This is how it comes down,” he said, interrupting whatever Liam was about to say. “I want you, Eden. You’re the best thing that’s happened to me since… well, since all that blew up. And I’m under no delusion that this guy doesn’t want you, either. There’s a reason we both like the same women. It’s because we’re like… fifty percent the same guy.”
“That’s being generous,” Liam drolly said. “I’d say thirty-five percent.”
“What I’mtryingto say is that he and I have our issues, yes, but it shouldn’t reflect on you. I’m sorry that I didn’t tell you about this when we were getting serious. I should have.”