I groan. "Neither."
Austin smiles, not unkindly. "Then just take your coffee and your pride and pick up that sweet girl of yours. Tomorrow's another day."
I linger by the counter a moment longer, swirling the ice in my cup. "Did it look that bad?"
Austin tilts her head. "It looked real. That's what scares folks the most."
"Real?" I echo. "You think so?"
She nods slowly. "Yeah. You looked like two people who actually cared. And that makes people uncomfortable. Makes them talk."
I sigh. "I don't know what I'm doing anymore."
Austin squeezes my hand over the counter. "Maybe that's how you know it's worth figuring out."
I nod and thank her, coffee in hand, then leave. The school parking lot is full by the time I get there. I wait in the parent pickup line, trying to shove the morning's tension deep down.
When she runs out and gets in the car, everything else falls away. At least for now.
Our normal after-school routine makes me forget everything else. Homework, dinner, bath, and bed are a comforting routine right now. The hours pass until Emma is in bed, and I finally sit down with a moment to think again.
The sun dips low, and my apartment is quiet. I stare at my phone on the coffee table for a long time before I do it.
Me:You awake?
No answer. I wait. I almost put the phone down. Of course, he isn't going to answer me. I don't think I'd answer if I were in his shoes.
Then it buzzes, and my heart races.
Bear:That depends. You bringin' attitude or just lookin' for company?
My laugh catches in my throat.
Me:Can it be both?
Bear:Always. Though I prefer your company. What's going on?
Me:I screwed up.
Bear:How bad?
Me:Bad enough I miss you. Bad enough, I wish I could forget everything and just... be.
There's a pause, and I don't expect the text that comes next.
Bear:You'd look better in my shirt than stressing over those suits.
My heart stumbles.
Me:That sounds dangerously close to flirting.
Bear:Good. 'Cause I'm dangerously close to driving over there.
Me:Wouldn't be the worst thing.
Bear:Tempting a cowboy, Sunshine. Risky territory.
Me:I think I'm already in it.