I nod. Their concern lingers even after they change the subject, but I don't say more. Just listen, feeling their words settle in the back of my mind like dust that won't quite shake loose.
We settle in and talk about crops, weather, and the price of feed. Regular things. Safe things. But I'm only half listening. My thoughts drift more than they should to a woman who shouldn't matter as much as she does.
If Josh notices, he doesn't say anything, but he watches me with that quiet kind of knowing. The kind only someone who's loved and lost and loved again can wear in their eyes.
That night, after dinner and cleanup, and another round of checking on Duke, Zach joins me on the porch with a couple of beers. He hands me one and sits down beside me.
We drink in silence for a minute, watching the stars blink into place overhead.
"You've been quiet lately," Zach finally says, nudging my boot with his.
I take a long sip before answering. "Just thinking."
"About her?"
I don't answer, but I don't need to.
Zach smirks. "You know, I never thought I'd see the day my big brother caught feelings for someone he's not sure he can trust."
"I don't know if it's that simple," I say.
"It never is."
Before I can respond, both our phones buzz. It's a group text from Finn.
Finn:Got in safe. Place is dusty but decent. Here's the view.
There's a photo attached of a wide-open arena, bleachers on one side, sun casting shadows across the dirt. It unsettles me, causing a quiet ache in my chest.
"Kid's living the dream," Zach says.
I nod. "Let's hope it doesn't break him."
Zach tips his bottle toward me. "To surviving dreams."
We clink bottles. After a while, Zach heads in, leaving me alone on the porch.
The stars are out, sharp and clear, as if someone scattered diamonds across black velvet. The air smells like hay and earth and wood smoke from the neighbor's chimney. A soft breezemoves through the trees, and somewhere in the distance, a coyote yips.
And I think of her.
Of Kassi.
Her laugh curling around the edges of a sentence. The look in her eyes when she talks about her daughter. The moment she stumbled, I caught her, and neither of us wanted to let go. The feeling of almost. Almost kissing her. Almost saying more.
I pull out my phone, thumb hovering for a second before I open our thread.
Me:You still awake?
It takes a few minutes, but the dots appear.
Sunshine:Barely. Long day. You?
Me:Same. Had a visit from my sister, who wanted to check on Duke. Spent some time catching up.
Sunshine:That's good to hear. He's tough. Like his owner.
I smile a little, the compliment hitting in a place I didn't know needed it.