“The door is—”
I cut him off with a kiss that he does not deny me. He melts against me, his tongue sliding against mine, his lips as soft as ever.
“It’s only us here,” I whisper, dragging my lips along his jaw and along his neck where I kiss and lick him more. “And I would love to fuck you right here.” I tap my desk. His gaze goes to it, eyes frantic.
“On your desk?”
“Mm. I think it would be great. Don’t you?”
“Well, I, uh, thought that we weren’t doing that here—during these hours?”
His words are a bucket of ice water being dumped on my head. I step back, putting distance between us.
“You’re right. I’m sorry.”
“No, that’s not what I meant.” He steps toward me, grabbing my arm. “I’m… trying to make sense of this. That’s all.”
“I think sense with us has gone out the window.”
He smiles. “I think you’re right. It’s just that…” He licks his lips, taking a breath.
“What is it?” I cup his cheeks. “Tell me what it is.”
“I don’t want to do anything wrong.”
“You won’t.”
“You say that, but you put all these rules in place. We agreed that we wouldn’t do this during certain hours, and it’s not that I don’t want to, but it feels like you want to. I can’t understand why you keep making these rules only to break them. I don’t want to ruin this. I need this, you know.”
More ice water.
“Because of the money.”
“No, it’s not—” He stops, his eyes falling closed. “It’s notjustthe money, Harmon. I like this, too. It’s good. I’m happier. I like everything we do together, and I don’t care that there aren’t rules. I’m perfectly fine going with the flow and doing anything you want whenever you want it. Trust me, I amtotallyfine with it. But I’m worried about you.”
“You’re worried about me?”
“Yes,” he blurts, sounding slightly annoyed. “You’ve been stressed out with this legal stuff for weeks. I can see it. You put these rules in place to keep things in order, and then we break them, and don’t act like it doesn’t bother you. Because I know it does. I see that too.” His hand slides up to press against my chest. “It’s not that I don’t want to do it, but I want to make things easier for you. That’s why I’m here, right? That’s my job?”
“We both know this is more than just a job now, Cassius.”
The admission is freeing, like a weight slipping from my shoulders.
Hope blooms in his eyes for a split second before it disappears.
“I know that. It’s a mess. But it’sourmess… and it doesn’t have to bemessy. If that even makes sense…”
“Surprisingly, it does.”
“Look, if you’re fine with bending me over this desk and fucking me right now, when I’m supposed to be your slave, please do it. But if this is going to bother you later, then don’t.”
“It won’t bother me later,” I state.
He leans forward, pressing his lips to the corner of my mouth then moves closer to my ear and whispers, “Then what are you waiting for?”
Chapter Thirty-Two
Cassius