Troy hit the bed control to raise himself further. “I read some of the letters. I…I never realized how many people were hurting out there. It puts my sexual assault in perspective. I’m going to call it what it is. No more assault or attack. It was a violent sexual assault.”
Gwen seemed to be mustering a smile.
“Gwendolen, what’s wrong?” His eyes swept over her face.
“Just tired, I suppose.” She continued to set out plasticware.
“My beauty, I never want you to be afraid to tell me anything.” He pushed back the bed tray and pointed to the spot beside him. “Kick off your shoes and rest here.”
Gwen moved to rest in his arms. The embrace brought on a ripple effect of tears and shakes. “Kip, he said they were trying to find me some answers.” She explained the honest mix up. “The man, the men… one was one of the agency guys who assigned me to the mission. But the other man…he was CIA infiltrating the cell. He said I was a matter of course. He was the man who…two thousand lashes…” By now her breaths were coming in gulps.
“Breathe with me. You’re going to pass out.” His monitor screamed. Medical staff and Trask came flying in.
“Headcap, turn off this damn monitor. Everyone out. Headcap, if anyone but Ian or Kip wants entry, say no, and if they persist, shoot them,” Troy warned, his eyes blazing.
Trask turned the monitor and ordered stragglers to clear the room, then he closed the door behind him.
Troy weighed his mental questions. Should he wait for her to continue, or should he press?
She made the decision for him. “Day twenty-five, four of the women brought me to be purified for the caliph. It was a ritual bath and placement of oils.”
He mentally prepared himself for…rape…sodomy… He began running through a list of evil he’d encountered in his career. But three words turned his heart to rock. He never felt this murderous in his life.
“They realized I was pregnant. I took a test the day before I deployed. It had to be Will’s.” She took a shattered breath, then sat up.
Troy held on to her with all his strength. He needed her to know he loved her. “There is nothing you can say in the next few minutes that will make me love you any less. I love you. Hear me? I love you.”
She shook her head. “No,” she said, “I committed a horrible sin. I murdered my unborn child. I couldn’t stop them. I was too weak. I swear. El-Saab and two women held me down, and they took the baby.” Her body withered against him, and she cried harder than he’d ever seen.
Troy slid her across his thighs and rocked her against him. “It doesn’t work that way. God and I both know you didn’t commit a murder. You were brutalized.” He combed her hair with his fingers. “I’ve got you.”
As he held her, he managed to text one-handed.
Troy to Ian: Where is that animal? I have a bullet with his name on it.
Troy to Kip: I know. We need to fix this.
Kip to Troy: Ice and Alamo are interrogating. They’ll go as long as it takes. Kieran is in meeting with the former CIA director. Ian is with other CIA puke.
Troy to Kip: Gwen in my arms. Find my mom. Tell her to bring her Bible. Give her a simple explanation what happened.
Kip to Troy: Roger.
A few minutes later, Trask knocked and opened the door. Gwen had washed her face and returned to the security of Troy’s arms. “Boss, Kip and your mom are here.”
“Thanks. Hi, Momma.”
She reached for Troy’s hand and squeezed it. “Hello, Gwendolen. Sometimes men get so overwhelmed with trying to fix things, they forget to be. They most often do those kinds of things when they love the woman. My son, if he hasn’t told you, loves you.
“Kip found his words and told me about your loss, and if I have the story correct, the misplaced feelings you have about what some horrible people did to you. God is a cause of joy and sorrow, but when His words are misconstrued, beliefs are empty and fragile. If I didn’t understand that concept, how could I believe in Him after what was done to my son? Kip, come close. Let’s hold hands,” Fani said.
“Dear Lord, You carry the basket of infinity. You are the comfort; You are the enfolding arms. Please encircle dear Gwendolen in her grief. Cocoon her within Your arms of love, whisper Your truth into her soul, and keep each splinter of her damaged heart and mind safe. Absolve her of her guilt and pain, for she committed no sin. My Lord, we rest her in Your arms. Hold her, watch over her. Help her learn that her child is safe with You. Found, known and cherished. In the name of the Father, Thy Son and the Holy Spirit. Amen.”
Gwen moved to her feet, walked to Fani, and embraced her. “Thank you so much.”
“You’re most welcome.” Fani smiled.
Chapter 37