That was one of the things that I enjoyed about Clyde. He never told me how I should live my life. Mom expected me to have some amazing love story just like she did with Dad. Clyde cared that I was happy.
“I’ll make it up to you.”
“Make it up to me by being yourself next time I see you.” He rapped his knuckles on the table before finishing his beer and heading out.
I took a breath and looked back at the woman that I had been eyeing. She was still looking at me and giggled when my eyes met hers again.
Usually I would try to strike up some kind of conversationbefore heading in to do anything else. Tonight, I wasn’t in the mood for talking. Obviously, that hadn’t gone well for me. I tilted my head, gesturing toward the hallway where the restrooms were, hoping she would get the hint.
She turned and said something to her friends before heading in that very direction.
I didn’t waste time. The second I was near her, I pulled her in for a kiss. I wouldn’t mind going pretty far in this bar, and then I could take her back to the hotel and enjoy the rest of my night.
I didn’t need to know her name or anything else about her.
But as my lips slid over hers, my mind went somewhere else. Suddenly, I wasn’t in a bar anymore. I was back in the Treasure Trove with Grace.
This woman didn’t kiss like her, and her breathy moans were over the top. They didn’t feel real like Grace’s had. Normally, my body would be responding the instant that I laid my hands on someone else, especially when it had been this long.
But there was nothing. No part of me was interested in her.
And that was when I pulled away.
The woman in front of me got the wrong idea. “Please tell me you have an apartment or a hotel.”
I tried to think about it. I tried imagining her light-colored hair spilled over my pillow. Tried to imagine going further with anyone other than Grace.
And my dick somehow got softer.
“I need to go.” I couldn’t believe the words that were coming out of my mouth.
Her bottom lip stuck out in a pout. “But?—”
“Sorry, you’re very beautiful, but I’m not into it.”
She wasn’t deterred. “I can make you be into it.” She pulled me back in for a kiss, her hand drifting downward.
This time, I pushed her away. “No, I don’t think you will.”
Her brow furrowed and I could tell she was starting to get offended. I needed to get out of here before I broke another one’s heart.
“Have a nice night, ma’am.”
I left the bar in a rush. I told Clyde that I would try to have fun tonight, but obviously that wasn’t happening. Instead of going somewhere else where I might be able to play pool or some cards, I drove straight to the hotel.
Mom had wanted me to call her to catch up, more than likely because she was so worried. I could try to placate her while ignoring my actual problems.
“Dean?” Mom asked when I called. “You’re calling me at a decent hour?”
“Don’t sound so shocked,” I said.
“You haven’t called me before ten since you discovered the other sex.”
“Shouldn’t you be happy? You hate it when I go out to the bars.”
“You have me there. I just worry.”
“You have nothing to worry about.” That was a lie, but I tried to make sure she knew I was all right ever since we’d gotten the call that Dad was gone.