I tried to hide the way I stiffened when she mentioned him. People were well meaning when they would compare me to him, and Ididlook a lot like him with my lighter hair and eyes. But some days, the reminder that he was gone made all that grief come back. These days, I liked to focus on what I shared with Mom, since she was the one who I saw all the time.
“Yeah, I guess.”
Normally, Mom would pick up on my tighter tone, but she was lost in memories. “You know, that’s how he asked me out. It worked. I bet it’ll work again. Julie is a sweet girl.”
She always had been. We’d grown up together, and she was one of the few people in town that had been here since birth. I thought she was pretty, but she’d always been a part of the popular crowd, and I couldn’t believe she was going for me. But she’d pulled me into a closet and had her way with me, and we’d been messing around ever since.
Technically, the field I was in wasn’t ours; it belonged to the owners of the massive house next door. But they had more thanenough to go around, so I grabbed flowers and arranged them the best I could, and then went inside to get dressed.
“I’m ready,” I said as I walked in.
“That looks nice. Julie’s gonna love them.” Mom grabbed her keys and tightened her ponytail before we walked out the door.
It wasn’t a long drive to the high school, but I grew more and more nervous as time went on. I liked Julie. A lot. I hoped she said yes; I really wanted this to work.
“Go and get ’em, kid.” Mom patted me on the shoulder.
“Thanks,” I said. I took a breath before hurrying out of the car.
Julie was by her locker surrounded by her friends. She’d gotten in with all of the new kids in town, the ones who had nice clothes and fancy cars. I knew none of them cared that much for me, judging by the way they stared and whispered when I walked by, but I wasn’t one to be scared of someone’s opinion of me. Love conquered all of that, after all.
Her eyes were wide when she turned to me. Up until now, our rendezvous had been a secret. She would catch me either before anyone was around when Mom had to drop me off early or after most of the kids had left for the day. Sometimes, she would drive me to the movies and we’d have fun there. We were never around her friends, though.
But if we were doing this, it was time to come out of the shadows.
“Oh, hi ...” Her voice was unsure, but I smiled at her anyway.
“I got these for you,” I said.
“Oh ... Thanks. Where are these from?”
“I picked them for you from my backyard.”
One of her friends coughed. It sounded suspiciously like a laugh.
Julie’s eyes darted to her friends and a blush settled on her cheeks. I wasn’t sure why she cared about what they thought. I knew they all talked about each other.
Julie had a gap in her teeth, and the one staring me down had been talking to another girl about how she needed braces. Hell, I’d caught Julie’s last boyfriend, a guy who’d just moved to town, talking about how she didn’t put out enough.
I’d punched him in the face. The in-school suspension was so worth it because I had a feeling that was when Julie finally noticed me.
We all only had one summer together before we went to college. I was going to a trade school in Nashville, and I knew she was planning to go to a college in the city too. Once she said yes to being my girlfriend, I wanted to show her how a man should be. I wouldn’t talk about her behind her back. I would stick around and be with her for exactly who she was.
“Can I walk you to class?” I asked.
“Why would you wanna walk me to class?” She laughed, looking in between her friends. “Thanks, though.” I frowned as she walked away.
The girls walked close together, talking about whatever they had going on. The flowers were still in my hand. With a sigh, I put them in my locker before heading to class. It would be hard to convince her to change, but Mom said that Dad had asked her out five times before she said yes. I’d be stubborn.
I didn’t see her again until later. The plan was to meet at the vacant electrical room so we could get some time alone together before anyone caught us.
“There you are,” she said, finally smiling at me before pulling me into a kiss. I knew she was about to drag me through the wooden door into the dark, but I wanted to ask this before she did anything else.
“Wait, we should talkfirst.”
“Since when do we talk?” she asked as she shook her head. “Don’t worry about that. Let’s just have fun.”
“Hang on a second.” My grip on her tightened. “About this morning ...”