“Oh, is this one ofthosegirl meetups?” Mollie asked. “Is everything okay?”
“Did Dean do something?” Wren asked.
“Dean hasn’t done anything. Not even reach out.”
“I’ll kill him,” Jade said immediately. “No matter how much he’s done for you.”
“I thinkIdid something,” I said. “I tried to set him up with someone that was flirting with him.” All three women stared at me like I was growing a second head. “So, bad move?”
“Honestly, yeah, considering I’m pretty sure you have feelings for him.” I loved my best friend. Except when she called me out and was right about it.
“I’m trying to be cool. I do like him, but we’re not together. And he turned down this one really nice girl just because he’s with me. I don’t have to like it but ... he doesn’t have to give anything up for me.”
“And what did he do?” Wren asked slowly.
“I don’t know. He got quiet, he left, and then hasn’t reached out. Hell, he might be with her now.”
“Where was this?”
“Knoxville,” I replied.
Her lips pressed together in a thin line. “Hedoesgo out to jobs out there.”
I let out a sigh. “Great. So that’s probably where he is.”
“Maybe. Maybe not.” Wren shrugged. “The way he looks at you speaks for itself. He has feelings for you.”
“Then why not tell me? Why keep his distance at every move?” My voice grew hard and my grip grew tighter on my tea. No. I didn’t need to think this way. “I would love to think that, but he’s just being friendly. Not romantic.”
“It’s obviously bothering you,” Mollie said gently. “So why did you set him up with someone else?”
“I think I needed the reminder that he’s not mine. And I know this is my fault. I’m not the kind of girl who can be friends with someone I’m attracted to and never fall for them. I was set on this path when I slept with him. And now I’m tied to him forever. It’s almost better to ... break my own heart than embarrass myself.”
“Yeah, no.” Jade shook her head. “No good comes from getting your heart broken, trust me.”
She spoke gently again, which meant she was serious. I was about to spiral over my own decisions again when Wren interrupted.
“Maybe this distance is good,” Wren said. “You can get your head on straight and then figure out what to do when he’s back.”
“I’m not telling him, that’s for sure. I know how this ends.”
I could say it all I wanted to, but there was this nagging feeling that I couldn’t shake. I felt like I was missing something, that Ineededto figure him out.
And I didn’t know why I couldn’t let it go.
“We should go to that crochet night,” Mollie announced. “Because Grace needs a distraction.”
“Yeah, girl time erases boys,” Wren said. “We’re here for you.”
“Thank you,” I said. “I’ll take you up on that girl time. I need ... any kind of distraction right now.”
“Tomorrow. The library. The four of us are messing with yarn.” Jade slammed her hand down on the table.
“Are you gonna try to murder someone with it?” Mollie asked. “Be honest.”
“It depends on my mood for the day.”
Despite myself, I smiled. “Do you even have the patience for this?”