For the first time since we crashed through the door, neither of us moves.
It’s theweightof it.
The knowing.
That when this happens—whenwehappen—there’s no going back.
His fingers tangle with mine, threading together, pressing my hands into the mattress just above my head.
I watch his throat bob as he swallows hard, his lashes fluttering against his cheek.“This is real, isn’t it?Please tell me it’s real.”
My chest tightens.
I can only nod.
A slow, almost disbelieving laugh escapes him.His nose skims against mine, soft, reverent.
“We were so fucking stupid,” he murmurs.
I exhale a shaky breath, brushing my lips against his.“Speak for yourself.”
Joel pulls back just enough to look at me, blinking like he misheard me.
His lips part.Then he huffs a laugh, shaking his head.“Are you kidding me right now?”
I grin, tilting my hips just enough to make him suck in another sharp breath.“Hey, I’m just saying,oneof us had to be right eventually.”
Joel groans, dropping his forehead to my clavicle.“Unbelievable.”
A lazy grin spreads across my lips.“You knew what you signed up for.”
“So true,” he mutters, tracing his tongue up my collarbone to the column of my neck—and that has my smugness evaporatingrealfast.“Keep talking, Ace.See what happens.”
Iwould, but then he’s kissing me again—deeper, slower.
Somewhere in the middle of it, the remnants of my clothes find a way to the floor.The same happens to his bottoms, but we stay there, hands exploring each other while our mouths remain locked together.It’s like we can’t breathe without each other now.
Skin to skin, my brain wants to marvel at the way he feels in my hand, against my body, but processing beyond how good it feels is impossible.It’s like I live for the sounds he makes and the ones he draws out of me.
And when he finally pushes into me, when our bodies fully,finallycome together, I feel it deep in my soul.A knowing.A truth.Something ancient andundeniable.
We were never meant to be anything but this.It’s why it hurt so deep then.Why I couldn’t forgive him—or myself.
This wasalwaysour truth.
Joel shudders—hard.His lips drop to mine, his hands tightening at my waist like he’s holding on for dear life.
“Jesusfuck.You feel—fuck,” he rasps, his voice nothing but gravel.
I gasp, my nails digging into his back, as a moan floats past my lips.“Oh, my God, Joel.”
I can’t even speak.Can’t breathe.
His thumb skates along my jaw, his breath ragged.“Say my name again.”
“Don’t stop, Joel,” I practically pant, keeping my eyes on his—holding his gaze like an embrace.
He stills above me, his breath uneven, ragged.His hands thread through mine, fingers tangling, pinning them above my head.