PROLOGUE
The Incident
DATE: NOV 16
To: kdbookonline.com
From: kdbookonline.com
Subject: The WORST
Dear Millie,
Per our discussion at lunch, I’ve compiled my argument in regard to your leaning to the dark side, AKA letting yourself believe that Miles Taylor isn’t the actual worst. That is, indeed, the case, and I feel compelled to inform you that the man with the “fine pair of hams” just spent the past ten minutes berating me in the hallway. It’s time you know the truth about “the hottest attraction this school has ever seen.”
I almost threw up in my mouth just typing that.
Once you peel you’re eyes away from the “sexy forearms” and the “hair a girl could run her fingers through” (side note: youreallyneed to start reading higher quality books), you’ll see what I see, which is NOT anything like Wade Kinsella, okay? Your Hart of Dixie comparison is crap. Wade Kinsella was a charming bad boy with a heart of gold. Miles is a self-righteous, know-it-all, arrogant adrenaline junkie with a heart of coal.
‘Tis the season.
Just in the last week, he has forced completely unsolicited advice down my throat, criticized me and all my life choices, made fun of my volunteering to help at the staff meeting, and made snide comments while I was kindly helping out Mr. Johnson in the copy room, all while inviting me to have one of his stupid Friday donuts like he was doing me a favor by being in his company.
These are the facts. Now that you’ve joined the Miles Fan Club along with every other person at this school, I would like you to explain to me his alleged appeal outside of his “sweet as sugar personality,” because I don’t get why he’s got the whole school eating out of his hands while only I can see what he really is:
A stinking, rotting fish in a sleazy, younger Brad Pitt-esque package.
Love,
Olive
P.S. In case you’re wondering. I’ve never been a fan of Brad Pitt, so that wasn’t a compliment. More of a Bradley Cooper girl myself.
P.P.S. Feel free to debate. I’ll go down swinging.
DATE: NOV 17
To: kdbookonline.com
From: kdbookonline.com
Did you get my email from yesterday? I’m losing my steam over here. Very disappointed in your counterattack.
DATE: NOV 17
To: kdbookonline.com
From: kdbookonline.com
What email? The one you sent with the dog and the balloon? That was hilarious. I showed it to Hank and the kids when I got home.
DATE: NOV 17
To: kdbookonline.com
From: kdbookonline.com
No. The one I sent about your “friend” who works across the hallway from me.