Iwantedit.
Alexei squeezed my hand. The edible seeped through my blood, leaving nothing but mental clarity behind, and if I hadn’t known before we came here that I was ready, I knew now.
Jevon brought the ceremony to a spiritual end. With the legal side finished too, it was done, and the brothers who’d stayed home likely heard Rubi’s whoop in Devon.
The formalities broke up. Cam rose to embrace his little brother and his oldest friend. I stayed where I was, the need to flee fizzling out as the crowd dissipated.
Alexei didn’t move either, save to scratch Lida’s ears. “She is a good dog. I will miss her when they go home.”
Viktor and Ranger.
I didn’t want to think about that today.
So I didn’t. I let my gaze skate around the orchard to where Folk lingered with his siblings—his pink-haired sister and his broader and taller younger brother.
“Them Whitlock genes are something else.” Nash stole Cam’s vacated seat. “What do they eat in Norfolk?”
I shrugged.
Alexei rose and walked away.
I watched him go, tracking him until little hands tugged at my jeans.
Hope clambered into my lap and stood up, facing me, her dark eyes wide and curious.
I tilted my head.What?
She laughed and I knew what she wanted—the baby-safe fidget toy I’d made her, but I didn’t have it, so she had to settle for trampling me instead, until she got bored and went to sleep with her arms locked around my neck.
Mateo came to get her.
I waved him off.We’re good.
Nash pulled a face—for him at least.
I sighed. “What?”
“What’s changed with you and her?”
“Who?”
“Don’t be... what’s the fucking word?”
“You’re asking me?”
“Eh. Maybe not.” Nash shifted Finan to his other arm, bringing the son he’d named after me closer. The baby was asleep, concealing his dark and gentle gaze, but this kid had an aura as potent as any edible, as potent as his father, and I always felt good around him. “Suppose what I’m asking is why you’ve never held my kids.”
Hope was going to be bigger than her sister. She had long legs and bony knees that dug into my ribcage. I was still getting used to her scent—she didn’t smell like Ivy, and until a month ago, Decoy’s little girl was the only kid I’d ever caged in my arms at all. “I feel better when they can leave whenever they want.”
Nash frowned. I needed to explain it better, but my CBD-chilled brain didn’t have the vocabulary for all that right now. To pacify him, I traced a fingertip on the back of Finan’s tiny hand. His eyes opened, ageless wisdom already swimming there. Our time would come, and when it did, this kid was going to teach us all things about ourselves we never knew existed.
I stood with Hope in my arms, scanning the crowd. I spotted Embry and took a step towards him.
“Wait.” Nash caught my arm. “I’m too dense to see everything you do, but if the last few months have taught me anything, it’s that we have a choice how all the horrible shit they did to us lays its roots. You can grow a new tree or die in the fucking earth, but whatever that means to you, brother, whether you like it or not, my kids are always going to choose you.”
Nash held my gaze, a depth to his he’d hidden from me all the years I’d known him. A depth we’d had to learn fromViktor. But I heard what he was saying and I found a smile. Found the words that echoed everything Rubi and River had already said. “I choose them too.”
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