Not enough.
I wrenched the tap off and scratched a rough towel over my face, breathing hard.
Then I was in motion, barrelling away from the sink and shoving past Ranger again, the bunkhouse a blur as I strode out the door, leaving him behind as anger became this wicked thing I knew was wrong, but I let it pull me under all the same.
That was the thing about rage. It clawed at you when you were down, exploiting your weakest moments. Blind to it, I stormed across the yard, gaze pinned on the garage and the first King I’d ever trusted.
He lied to me.
No, he didn’t.
He protected me.
Hesavedme.
But I was too far gone to see anything but the fact he’d kept this from me. His reasons didn’t matter. Neither did mine. He’d let me fuck him while knowing the worst things that had ever happened to me were coming for me all over again.
He let mefall in love with him. And maybe that was the worst of it. The worst ofme. That I loved someone who’d given me so fuckin’ much without letting me give a damn thing in return.
15
ORLA
I felt it before I glanced up. The ripple in the air. The riot of anger, and the disquiet that came with it.
The compound had been my home since I was a toddler. I knew every inch of it. Every brick, every fibre. Every particle that shifted with the moods of the people around me. And I always knew when something had changed.
It was usually Cam, River, or Nash. Sometimes even Saint or Rubi.
It had never been Locke.
The bunkhouse door banged open and he powered across the yard, his face twisted in an expression I’d never seen. Not on him. Eyes ablaze with anger and yet somehow dull at the same time.
Locke’s eyes were never dull. They were a summer afternoon by the river, laughing and kissing your best friend. A gentle spark of humour on your worst day.
Rational.
Undramatic.
The wildness only came when he was buried inside me, tightening his tattooed fingers around Nash’s?—
“The fuck is going on out there?” Rubi leaned back in his seat, already halfway to mild irritation; my company had that effect on him. “What crawled up Locke’s arse?”
“I don’t know.” I pushed my chair back and surged to my feet as Locke stormed into the garage.
Rubi caught my arm. “Maybe you should let them have it out.”
“Letwhohave it out?”
“Last time I checked, only Nash and River were in the garage, and I can’t think of a single reason why Locke would be storming down Riv like that.”
“But you can for Nash?”
Rubi shrugged. “Locke didn’t know we were chasing Crows on his behalf any more than you did, and whenyoufound out, most of us lost a bollock.”
“Locke’s not a bitch like me.”
“No, but he’s been through a lot, and that shit takes time to filter through. I’m guessing it’s just hit him that Nashie didn’t tell him we knew about Priest, and he needs to fight it out.”