“She does now.” Locke set the plate aside and took Cam’s shaky hands in his own. “Andyouknow how PTSD works. Let her scream. Don’t hide from it.”
Cam stared off in a bad daze.
Locke coaxed him back. “I called you off. Told you to leave it. If you’d listened to me, if Nash’d had a radio, that truck would’ve barrelled into my kids. I could’ve lost them both. Let her scream, brother. It means she’s alive. Because ofyou.”
Cam nodded, slowly, tapping into the recovery armour he’d nurtured over the past few years. Tapping intoLocke, and it made me look closer at what I’d seen between him and Logan tonight. Then wish I hadn’t, as a harsh wave of guilt kicked me in the gut.
Locke and Logan. Logan andLocke. Their bond was so pure. So vital and healing. Why the hell had it taken Nash nearly dying to bring them together? Why hadn’t we broken every rule in the book when Locke had needed it most and given him the one thing—theonlything—that could’ve saved him all these weeks of pain?
We fucked up. That’s how I saw it. How Nash would see it. That Locke would never agree didn’t seem to matter.
Cam ate his dinner/breakfast/whatever. I’d lost track. Then, with Locke close by, he finally fell asleep.
I sent Saint and Alexei an update.
Orla:Cam ate. He’s asleep now. Locke’s taking care of him.
Saint:he might dream. don’t leave him alone.
Alexei:Everything important happens while we are awake.
I ignored that, assuming it was for Saint. And my instinct proved correct a few seconds later.
Alexei:What are these sandwiches Nash talks of in his sleep?
Orla:Nothing you would eat, sweetheart x
Alexei:Obviously.
I sent him a middle finger emoji. He didn’t reply. I told Saint I loved him.
He said it back.
Fatigue began to get the better of me. Logan and Remy’s couch was big and soft. I curled up at the end closest to Cam, watching through heavy eyes as Locke took a seat on the floor, staying close to my brother, knowing he needed him more than I did right now.
I love him so much.
It was my last conscious thought for a while. Logan came to sit with me. I dumped my head in his lap and fell asleep, not caring that we’d only met a few hours ago.
He didn’t seem to mind, his hands fraternal and protective on my shoulder.
The top of my head.
Despite the nightmare we were all surviving, it was a nice place to be.
Safe.
I was gone until Locke shook me awake sometime later. “Can we go back yet?”
He pressed a finger to my lips. “Not yet. It’s still dark, but I want to show you something. Lo’s got Cam.”
Locke hustled me off the couch, into my boots and a coat that smelled of woodsmoke and copper, and outside into the fading night.
The sky had cleared, it had stopped raining. Locke pointed up the hill from where Logan and Remi’s house stood. “Come for a walk?”
Hiking was the last thing on my mind, but the light in Locke’s eyes could’ve convinced me to do anything.
I took his hand and we walked up the hill and to a plain stone building at the very top.