“Hereward took him outside. He likely won’t last through the night.”
Madoc nodded. He couldn’t stop his gaze from falling back on her while Alwyn held him up. Gareth said nothing while Madoc found whatever was left of his wits and turned away. “Forgive me, Gareth.”
His friend grinned at him. “For saving my wife’s life?”
For being in love with her.
“For…falling on her—”
“Forget it. Aye?” Gareth commanded with a gentle smile. “Put it away somewhere. You did what you had to do to save her. I’m in your debt. Now, go with Isolde to see the physician.”
Madoc’s stomach knotted and twisted, and it had nothing to do with the knife in his flesh. How could he betray Gareth by losing his heart to Tanon? He groaned and didn’t reply to Isolde when she asked him if he was all right to walk. He was miserable, a sorry excuse for a friend. But he’d never touched her intimately. He didn’t kill her when she sliced his face with a hidden blade and made him bleed.Then, she wished she had sliced lower to cut his throat! She was a hellcat to be sure. He hated deceiving her. It had nearly destroyed him and everything they had worked to accomplish. But Gareth would never let him live and…hell, he loved Gareth. He didn’t want to hurt him. He was born to fight, not for courtly love. So, he put thoughts of her away and offered his brothers a baleful glance when they came to pay him a visit. Tomas couldn’t stay long since Adara was heavy with their second child and chasing after little Deiniol.
“What’s wrong with you?” Cian asked him after he was seen by the castle physician and returned to his own bed.
“Nothing. I’m—”
“Madoc,” his youngest brother stopped him. “You look sad every day, brother. No matter what you’re doing, you look sad doing it. So, what is it?”
“Cian, listen to me,” Madoc said softly, slowly. “I…I understand what you’re saying. I’ll do my best to be my normally gruff self.”
“Madoc”—Cian began. Madoc holding up his palm, stopped him.
“There’s nothing you can help me with, little brother,” he whispered, staring at the floor, knowing what needed to be done.
Someone knocked from the front room and Cian hurried to see to it. A moment later, a girl dressed in blue-green robes appeared at the doorway to his room. “My lady wishes to speak with you.”
His heart accelerated and his breath came in short gulps. He was vaguely aware of Cian stepping to one side and the lady who announced her, to the other.
A toddler came running in on wobbly feet, followed by her mother. Madoc watched her toss back her head and laugh when she picked the babe off the floor and held her up.
“Lark, you must listen to mama and not run away, hmm?”
Madoc looked away from her full, pouting lips, the feigned disappointment etched in her smile.
“Cian,” she said, calling to him, “could you watch her while I speak with Madoc? Isolde, you can help, can’t you?”
“Of course, my lady.”
She smiled, flashing her alluring dimple at them as they went to the front sitting room.
“You ask a warrior to keep an eye on your babe before your own lady,” he remarked, finding it easy to talk to her.
Tanon flicked her gaze to him, her smile intact. “Cian is like her second mother. He adores her.”
Though he smiled at her, his tone was stern and gruff. “You’ve succeeded in turning Gareth and Cian into soft-hearted lambs.”
Her eyes softened on him and then filled with tears that fell down her face.
He tried to sit up, but she put her hands on his shoulders to stop him. He paled. “Madoc, I’m so sorry. I…I know how you feel…about me.” She looked into his obsidian gaze. “It must stop. Not just for Gareth’s sake, but for yours. You know Rebeca, my nurse, who became Hereward the Wake’s wife? Well, for almost twenty years she was in love with my father. I saw what it did to her. I won’t let it do the same to you.”
“My lady,” he met her gaze. “I won’t bring shame to either of you. You have my word.”
She cast her beguiling smile on him. “Thank you for saving me, Madoc. My daughter will thank you one day, as well.”
“I did it for Gareth,” he said with a casual shrug. “I know how he adores you.”
Her radiant smile warmed on him making him doubt his good senses. “That’s an even more gallant reason to save me. I know what he means to you.”