She raises her hands in mock surrender."Fine, fine.But don't think I haven't noticed that smile you're trying to hide.And we both know Gemma won't drop it so easily."
"What won't I drop?"Gemma asked as she walked over to grab her towel and dry off.
"Skye here doesn't want to talk about her new man.She just wants to talk about wedding stuff," Summer says, grinning.
"Why can't we do both?"Gemma says, taking a seat on the lounger on the other side of Summer.
"Because I don't want to talk about it," I say harsher than I mean to.Both girls stare but say nothing.
"When I'm ready to talk, you two will be the first to know, but right now it's just casual.I'm so glad you two found your happily ever after, but I'm not looking for that right now.I just want to finish school.Then I will have time to date properly.Until then, it's casual," I say in a softer tone.
They are both quiet for a moment before Gemma picks up a wedding magazine.
"I folded a few pages down in this one.Check them out," she says, handing it to me.
I smile, thankful for the change in subject.I'm not ready to talk about how Gage's texts have been the highlight of my days lately.Flirty.Filthy.Funny.Everything I didn't know I needed.But this isn't the time or place to dissect the complicated thing growing between us.
We spend the next hour flipping through sample invitations and venue photos, giggling over horrible dress designs and debating seating charts.It feels good to get lost in something normal, to let the tension of the last few weeks take a backseat.
Summer suddenly sits up, reaching for a small binder."Gemma was thinking about a sunset ceremony on the lake on that estate we were looking at.Can you imagine the light hitting the water, her in something soft and flowing, maybe barefoot?"
"It would be gorgeous," I agree, my fingers brushing the edge of a swatch book."She'd look like a goddess.Then she’d go inside to have the enchanted fairytale reception?"
"Yes!I'm thinking tons of fairy lights strung around potted trees.After the ceremony, they could get planted in our backyard," Gemma says.
I nod, already picturing it."Maybe some indoor fountains to create the sounds of nature too.We can do fairy lights in jars or vases on the tables instead of tea lights as well,” I say.
"Yes!That's the Skye I know.Finally, coming out of hiding," Summer says.
"I'm not hiding."
"You're glowing and pretending you're not, which is worse.I saw you check your phone trying to hide it so we don't see it."
I sigh, resting my head back on the chair."I can't help it.He makes me feel...seen.Like I'm not just a thing to be used or a body to dominate.It's different."
Summer's expression softens."Sounds like more than just a fling."
"It's complicated.We haven't even met outside the club.Not really.Not yet."
"But you want to?"
I hesitate, then nod."Yeah.I do.But then that leads down a dangerous path.I have one year of school, and then the finish line is in sight."
A long silence stretches between us, the hum of cicadas filling the space.I watch the sunlight dance across the surface of the pool, trying to quiet the war inside me.Wanting him is easy.Letting him in...well, that's another story.
We eventually cool off with a quick dip, floating lazily and laughing like we used to before life got messy.When we climb out, dripping and breathless, I feel a little lighter.Like maybe I can handle this.
When the sun dips lower in the sky, I gather my things and hug Summer and Gemma goodbye.
"Skye?"Summer says as I turn to leave.
I glance back.
"Tell your Dom hi for me."
I groan, flipping her off with a grin as I walk away.
My mom was so excited and feeling great, she asked me to meet her at her favorite little bistro, so I’m on my way to see her.The bistro is tucked just around the corner from her apartment, and she's already waiting when I arrive.When she sees me, she smiles and waves.I try not to tear up on my way over to her because she looks amazing, like she did before she got sick.