Saying the words out loud is agonizing.
“I know.” He runs his fingers through my hair. “I’m terrified too.”
“What if …” I start, but the tears stop me from being able to finish.
“No, we aren’t going to go there. The baby is going to be fine. It has to be.”
I nod my head, hoping he’s right.
“Eva, I’m so sorry.” His face looks like he’s in his own world of pain.
“For what?” I ask.
“Everything. For being a fool and not realizing what we have. For keeping my distance. For not being there sooner when you were in so much pain.”
The nurse continues to work around us, but I pay no attention to her. I’m trying to understand what he’s saying.
“I was losing my mind out there in the waiting room,” he continues. “Not knowing if I was going to lose you, lose the baby. Everything just fell into place. I love you so much, Eva. I’ve been crazy in love with you from the moment you walked into my office. I was so scared I’d lost you.”
This should warm my heart. It’s everything I’ve ever wanted. But all I hear is … he was scared. In the adrenaline of it all, he realized his feelings for me. Or did he just let the fear he was feeling cloud his judgment?
I want to believe him. But there’s something stopping me from letting my heart accept it. I would be crushed if I trusted him, only for him to take it all back when the dust settled. All I can picture is him panicking and running into my bathroom.
How does someone that afraid of love change his mind so quickly?
He grabs my cheeks and forces me to look up at him. His blue eyes shine at me with hope.
“Eva, did you hear me? I love you. I want this. You and the baby.”
Chapter Thirty-Two
Roman
She stares up at me, and all I see are the questions in her eyes. She doesn’t believe me. She doesn’t trust me. I can feel it.
I can’t blame her. What have I done to prove to her that I’m committed to her? Nothing. I’ll need to work for her trust. I can do that.
“What the fuck do you mean, you love her? What baby?” Walker’s voice hits me like a ton of bricks.
He’s standing at the entrance of the room, looking like he wants to murder someone. Me.
“Walker,” Eva gasps. “What are you doing here?”
“I called him,” I tell her, not taking my eyes off Walker.
She inhales, eyes wide. “You what?”
“Eva, I had to call him. I didn’t know what was happening, if you were going to be okay.”
“Eva, are you pregnant?” Walker storms in, approaching at an intimidating speed.
Eva is already under enough stress. Our baby needs her to be strong, and judging by the look on her face, she is anything but.
“Hey,” I bark at him. “Let’s you and I take this outside. Eva needs to rest. Putting more stress on her body is the last thing that she needs.”
The war that’s waging inside of him is evident. The betrayal, the fury, the absolute disbelief. He wants to react, but he looks at his sister, who’s pale and hurting. With monitors beeping like distant warning signs.
I see the rage and loyalty. Fury and fear. The need to defend his sister and the instinct not to make it worse.