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Before Dylan could answer, a server brought them their appetizer and Dylan’s tea.
Dylan poured tea into the mug. “I’m still kind of a mess. I’m figuring stuff out, but since we’re on the subject of the past.” His spoon scraped against porcelain. “I do also think I should say… I… uh… the thing with your friend. Jake Murphy. If you want to know what happened…”
Derek stiffened. “I shouldn’t have made assumptions about it, and it’s really not any of my business.”
“I don’t want you thinking the worst about me.”
“I don’t. Really.”
Over the last few weeks, Derek had thought about Jake a lot. Not just about the version Derek idealized, but about all of him. He didn’t need to know the details to trust the man in front of him.
Derek cleared his throat. “I do want to know the story about your mysterious house. You still haven’t told me what the deal is with that.”
“Right. The house.” Dylan’s face brightened. “I was visiting home at Christmas and was on one of my ‘prescribed mental health wellness walks,’ and I found this gorgeous fixer-upper near my parents’ house for sale, and I just bought it. Interest rates were low, and it had everything I wanted.”
“Impulsive.”
“Something I’ve always struggled with. With all the toxic stress of working in Silicon Valley, I barely had a personal life in California after breaking up with Chase and starting my company. It’s why my brothers initially tried to set me up when I came back for Christmas. They were trying to give me a reason to come back for good. Actually, I found my house on that same trip back. But when I buried myself in the renovation, I barely felt the days turn into months until two years went by. Time just passed. My family noticed I still didn’t have a life and that’s why the app profile thing happe—ugh. I’m sorry to bring that up again.”
“You don’t have to apologize. Jake and the dating app thing… it was all a long time ago.” Talking about Jake had gotten easier. But that added a new layer to his loss. A prick of guilt digging in deeper with each happy moment spent forgetting what he’d lost. Derek looked down, finding his hand in his lap, not remembering when he’d stopped holding Dylan’s hand. When his eyes returned to the man across the table, Dylan eyed him with a new curiosity.
“What?” Derek tilted his head.
Dylan cleared his throat. “This might be a really weird question, but did you and Jake date? Or… anything?”
Derek’s hand curled into a fist around his napkin. The server appeared to deliver their entrées, and Derek sent a prayer of thanks to the kitchen gods that their timing gave him another few extra moments to figure out what the hell to say.
“Jake is… was… you know, he was Olive’s brother. Uh… we were all really close. She would’ve had a conniption if I… if we had started dating.” He pushed a large bite of noodles in his mouth even though he was less hungry than he had been five minutes ago. Chewing gave his mouth something to do that didn’t make him feel guilty. Because you’re lying by omission, jackass. “Don’t get me wrong, he was a great friend to me.” He dropped his chopsticks on the side of the bowl and grabbed his water. No matter how much water Derek drank, he still had a weird burning feeling in his chest that wasn’t from his dish’s spice level. How could he even explain about Jake now? He didn’t even know how he was feeling about it or what anything between them had meant.
“Oh okay, I thought… I don’t know. Never mind. I don’t always read nonverbal cues right… probably should mention that.”
Derek’s stomach roiled, and he wet his dry lips. He should walk his implication back because he did trust Dylan. Come to think of it, during that shockingly intimate haircut, he had just talked about his dad and his dad’s death more than he had in years. More than he had even with Olive. He certainly never talked about Dad ever with his mom or sisters because it was too hard for them.
“How’s your mom doing? I feel like you haven’t been over there as much lately as you said you usually are. Did you see her today?”
“No, she wasn’t there when I went by for my stylist kit. Normally, I come over around this time every month to help with yard work, but she said it was already done.” Derek’s face lifted, relieved by the subject change. But the reminder stirred a sense of unease. How long had it been since he’d heard from his mom? “I was supposed to go over tomorrow too, but I still haven’t heard back. My sister Amy’s trying to figure it out. I’m trying to not get in the middle of it for once.”
“Probably wise if your sisters and mom are anything like mine. Is the sister you bought the apartment from still close by?”
Derek twisted his chopsticks in his food. “I don’t know where she is right now.”
Dylan’s quiet nod left space for Derek to say more. But instead, Derek told Dylan a few of the best stories of his sisters growing up.
When they were almost done eating, his phone buzzed in his pocket, startling him so much that he banged his knee into the table. Three missed texts in the last four minutes, but he hadn’t even noticed the other ones.
AMY
HELP. Babysitter puking her brains out. SJ and I are still in DC. Mom STILL not answering her phone dependably.
“Oh crap…”
“Everything okay?”
Derek’s thumbs tapped on the screen. “So, how do you feel about kids?”
“To be honest, I feel like it’s a little bit soon to have that particular conversation,” Dylan said dryly as he sipped his tea.
Derek’s open-mouthed horrified response only made Dylan chuckle.